Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Life is fragile...





Late last night and very into the morning (12 midnight to 2 am) I was having mild contractions and couldn't sleep. I actually started to get a little bit worried when I felt them 20 minutes apart. As Chip slept I debated whether or not to wake him. I was just about to do so when I noticed his cell phone ring a couple of times. It's unusual for him to get calls after midnight, so I woke him and handed him the phone and within a few seconds I heard his voice break as he received the unexpected news of the death of his uncle Johnny {who is pictured with Grandpa Willie in the last photo here}. We are heartbroken and saddened along with all of Chip's mom's side of the family and many friends that Johnny has acquired through the years.
Needless to say, neither Chip nor I got much sleep last night. I am feeling better and the contractions have subsided at this point. I have a dr. appt. tomorrow and hopefully we'll find that everything is progressing just as it should.
But it's moments in life such as these that continue to serve as reminders to me of not just the circle of life, but how fragile it really is. There are no guarantees- whether it's babies, children or grown ups. I find that this theme- of making the most of every moment- comes up so often in my heart and mind and I really strive to translate it into my everyday living. I want to live without regrets. I want to live life with passion and intention. I want people to know how much I love them and I want my life to stand for something so that whenever my time comes, I will know I have lived fully.
I found it interesting that just before bed last night I received a couple of emails from my (new) friend, Amber, who took these maternity pictures of me while we were together in Chicago. {Thank you, Amber!} They just seem so touching today as our family grieves the loss of a loved one, yet at the same time we prepare for the arrival of another {and Chip's sister too}. The baby bassinet bedding is being washed as I type and I just hope to pass on the message of loving this moment and loving beyond expectations in life. Too many times we get wrapped up in "little stuff" or in holding onto grudges or not giving of our hearts to others enough. I am guilty of it too...I can get stuck in a place where I am doing out of demands, rather than out of the overflow of my heart. I hope to remind myself over and over that to love is a gift. To serve others is a gift. To breathe in air and look for beauty in this world is a gift. To share and connect with others is a gift- no matter what. I thank God that He showers His love on us so that we can give love and encourage others to do so too.
Life is a wonderful thing. I hope I never forget just HOW amazing it is. And we will remember Johnny for his love of life and others too.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Praying for Chip, you and your family. Many blessings. Thank you for reminding me to cherish everyday. God is speaking to me through you. Jen from Cali

A. said...

Your message hits extra special today. With time to reflect, this is so much appreciated. My heart goes out to all your family in grief. Peace to you all,
Angie Lindeman

Sara said...

I'm so sorry about Chip's uncle, and will be praying for that little boy of yours that we've yet to meet.

Wouldn't it be nice if the baby was more active because Johnny's soul was just chatting with your little man for a bit; passing along family secrets and loving on him for you. I like to think the souls of those we love go ahead and love the ones who are yet to come for us.

Blessings on you all today...

sara
http://www.gitzengirl.blogspot.com

Hillary said...

Praying for you guys....

aascifres said...

I pray that God will wrap you and your precious family up in His ever capable comforting arms. I have been a lurker for a few months now, but especially this last week...I lost my brother this last week and YOUR blog has been such a comfort to me...thank you for being such a Godly vessel for God to send comfort through.
I am praying all the comforting prayers, that were prayed over me and my family, over you and your family!
Amy

surfmomma4 said...

I wanted to offer ny condolences on the loss of Chip's uncle. I'm also praying for a safe delivery of your liitle one..many blessings to you and your family.
Susan

Kate said...

your pictures are beautiful.
i'm so sorry about chip's uncle.
i just found your blog! i really like it.
wishing you all the best.
kate

All moments remembered said...

So sorry for your loss!! We had my father inlaw pass a couple weeks ago and it just so hard and sad. I hope your contractions stop! I know with each pregnancy I got earlier contractions and more of them. I had to rest a whole lot more. Are you pushing it to much? Mommy must rest!! Let us know how the DR appointment goes.

I wrote a blog this morning from my heart. I watch the movie August Rush last night and it stirred me inside. The comments back were so beautiful and so full of love. I wonder if you feel this each time you read your comment area. It sure makes you feel good to know you touched someone. You are in my prayers sweetie and again rest more!!! :)
Hugs to you,
Stacey

Jackietex said...

I'm sorry for the passing of Chip's Uncle Johnny. Death is so painful to those left behind--as you know too well. Can you imagine experiencing this life without faith in God? How much more difficult--or impossible it would be. Prayers being said for all of you.

Courtney said...

Praying for you and your family!

jkaustin said...

those pics of you are beautiful! :-)

sorry for the loss of Chip's uncle.