My thoughts turn...

Back to July 2001. As the weekend approaches and the anniversary is near, I can't help but remmeber. I have been reading through my posts and thoughts from last year at this time. They are filling my eyes with tears and making my heart well up. With both good memories and reminders that year after year, I still feel the sorrow, I still recall in vivid pictures all the details of that time.
I find it interesting that time moves on, but a heart never stops remembering. I invite you to read some of my posts from last year and let them touch you as they may. Tomorrow is Bella's birthday and we are so excited along with her to celebrate this day. She is enjoying today already- her last day of "being 5". I love that God has given us her life to celebrate and to soak up some fun at the same time my heart would rather be filled with reflection and hurt. I am thanking Him over and over for the blessings in our lives that far outnumber the hurts and trials. He has been good and faithful- as only He can be.
I also invite you to join me in prayers for Jaymun and his entire family. I have sat in their hurt and I have prayed for a miracle just as they are praying and having to surrender to at this very moment. My mind has a hard time understanding how such pain can ever be turned into something good in life. But I know from experience that God is a God of healing and He hears our prayers and cries and oftentimes He answers in unexpected ways. Life doesn't make sense when it comes to hurt...the answers may never come.
But there is still Joy and peace and mercy in abundance to all who are willing to seek it and let it come to them in new ways. Even now, as we're marking 7 years since the most unimaginable tragedy touched our lives I sit in wonder as I see how much healing has happened in our lives. I can't believe there is a new life growing inside of me and I constantly thank God that He has everything in control. It's only because of His love and tender mercies that I have found goodness at all. And as I should have expected 7 years ago- even though I never would have believed it could be true- He has filled my heart and life to overflowing. I am humbled by such mercies and can honestly say to Him, "Thank you for the brokenness that has made me much more of who You wanted me to become, all along".