Monday, February 26, 2007

What's a girl to do?

This should come as no surprise, but this whole comment business is becoming way too big of a deal around here. The big problem? Not what you would think...that I take offense to someone judging me, or that I can't handle the 'truth', or that people start 'answering back and forth' in the comments to defend or be offensive to me...I can deal with that. Yes, it's a bit "distracting" or bothersome to a degree...
But compared to the time it takes to read all the emails you all keep sending, it's nothing! Seriously. I keep praying about it and getting emails full of opinions one way or another, and then yet another way (Andy!) and it's been making me 'crazier' than I already am. =) So, here's the deal. I've been known to change my mind on things in life- even big things- like when I made Chip PROMISE me we would never have kids the night he proposed to me. Yeah...five kids later, I guess I changed my mind on that one. Or about wearing 'bell-bottoms'. I used to laugh at my Mom's photos back in the 70's with her slacks and chunky shoes. "I'll never wear pants like that!", I told her in the mid-eighties as I pinned my jeans before heading out for school. Now my favorite jeans are 'flared' at the bottom...and I love my chunky-heeled strappy sandals.
My point isn't that I make 'poor decisions', but that I am willing to "eat my words" or change my position in life, or just be flexible and do what I have to do to keep some sort of balance at times. This is one of those times. I really don't know what the big deal has been, or why it has caused so much discussion in my inbox, but I do know a couple of things. Here they are:
~I liked the freedom of people voicing their opinions, and the comments meant a lot to many of you who stop by and read this blog each day.
~My inbox is jamming with emails, and as much as I love mail, it seems too much mail can be a bad thing. Yes...I just typed the phrase 'too much mail'. =) I love your letters and read them all, but feel even more pressure to write y'all back! That's my problem! =)
~Part of me recognizes that as much as it started out that way, the idea that Nitty.Gritty. is just my little corner of the world, is no longer a true statement. I've had emails from Canada to Australia, and hundreds of places in between...and I'm not bragging or gushing about that. It's just a matter of fact- lots of you are reading, and not that I'm some superhero as I've tried to make perfectly clear on several occasions, I simply can't deny the fact that lots of you are part of Nitty.Gritty. too! You are. Admit it! {Some of you come here more than once each day! I'm okay with that...I just wanted to point it out to embarrass you. =)}
~Because of that fact, there are voices and opinions and support and/or criticism, and THAT is what the comments section is all about.
Basically, over the last several days as I've thought about it and prayed about it and read lots of different perspectives on it, I have realized that I really don't want to 'shut down' a very integral part of what makes this whole space "Nitty.Gritty." It's forcing me to change my mind and think critically (even though I don't think of this as a 'critical issue'...it's still a 'blog deal' {get it a 'blog deal! I know. That was bad.}) and so I'm going back to allowing comments. The fact that anybody is reading this blog after so many posts about comments is startling to say the least...but makes me feel like I 'owe it to you' to have a space for you to speak, listen and to see other's points of view.
I hope this works out. If not, in true Nitty.Gritty. fashion, I'll simply do some thinking, and change my mind once again...until I finally find what works best for me. I mean "us". =) I think Dr. Phil would be proud.

22 comments:

CyndiAKADisneyqueen said...

I said it before ( and I'm saying it again )....its your blog and you have a right to change your mind if you want to (smile). By the way I can tell you that you have at least 43 people who subscribe to your blog and who knows how many others that check in on a regular basis.

Jaena said...

Good for you, Jody! BTW, my husband said that it is possible to kind of track down anonymous commenters if a person "needed" to. He's a computer whiz, though. Sounds like you have come up with a workable option for now... :)

Cris said...

YAY, I am glad that you decided to bring back the comment section. Now I can thank you for posting that blog in yesterday's post. What she posted was something that I really needed to hear. :)

K :) said...

Cool. I like somebody who is open to changing their mind. I learned about 7 years ago to never say never...makes life fun to change things up when others least expect. As always, love your blog.

OP SuZ Q said...

Jody - you are priceless!! Love it!! To change back is your "perogative" as a woman, right?!! It all sounds great to me..........! THANKS!

... said...

YaY!! Jody, I already told you how great you are :) Way to go!

Sarah said...

So glad we can start leaving you comments again!
I love reading your blog! You are such an inspiration Jody!

Sarah

Shaun Paddock said...

I have been reading your blog for a couple of weeks now and after the first read I wanted to write to you to simply say Thank You. I cannot imagine going through the loss that you and your family have experienced and I am thankful that you have your faith to help you through. I have three beautiful children that are healthy and beautiful and a wonderful husband. I also have MS. For the first few years it was under control and I was still able to work. The past year I have declined and was forced to stop working and go on disability. At 44 years of age, I was not ready for this. I found myself enjoying time with my kids at school and scrapping. Lately after being sick for 9 weeks, I have started to feel sorry for myself. Then I read your blog. Yes, I still have my angry moments but then I go to your blog and snap out of it. I am a devout Catholic and rely greatly on my faith. Sometimes it just is not enough. So, thank you for taking over when my faith fails me. You have no idea what you have done for me and my wish is to have the opportunity to meet you someday. I am starting my own blog, had to to send you a comment (glad you changed your mind) and will send you the address when I get it set up.

Thanks again, and God bless.
Shaun

Barb K said...

Jody,
Two weeks ago I wrote a blog post that I linked to your blog. We have a tie in having both lost daughters, seeking what God has for us, having great husbands and kids, (and in my case, grandkids)and for lack of a better word, spunk. Press on, dear one. There are those who need to read your words of truth and life.
In Him, Barb K.

.Tom Kapanka said...

Man on the hall!
(see Feb. 10 for what that means)
It seems to me that blogs--especially blogs like Nitty Gritty--are like front porches.
(Go here to know what I mean by that: http://patternsofink.blogspot.com/2006/06/front-porch-frame-of-mind.html)
Some folks have little front porches and some folks, like Jody, have a big inviting veranda. The fact that it's open for people to pass by, have a sip of tea, "Sit long; talk much," etc. is cool. That's what front porches are about. (Chip and I and some other guys who come along now and then may rather go out back and throw some burgers on the grill--but that's just guys.)
I guess what I'm saying is...
front porch gatherings are inherently vulnerable to the occasional "drive by" blogger, who rolls down the tinted window just far enough to say without being seen, "I see you all sitting there, sipping tea, and having a good time as if life is hunky dory [is that how to spell hunky dory?], but I know you're all as dysfunctional as the rest of us." And then the car drives off with its occupants saying, "If they don't want us to drive by and say things like this, they ought to meet on the back deck, behind a privacy fence, so we don't have to see them. Otherwise, we're entitled to drive by and tell them what we think." (I'm not judging all anonymous comments, but it seems like that's what I was reading a few days back. I'm not trying to stir things up--just providing an analogy that may help.)

Sure, back decks with privacy fences and "by invitation only" yards are an option, but I'm glad you brought it back to the front porch, Jody. This gathering place will not be everybody's "cup of tea," but hopefully the neighborhood is big enough for people who don't like it to find contentment and commonality and "functionality" on another porch.
I'm not advocating an endless hug-fest and constant affirmation with no "real moments" of honest disagreement; and we would all agree that it shouldn't be about fame or popularity, etc. That's not healthy either; but front porches are for people willing to introduce themselves, to listen, to politely interact, to feel a little more "functional" and then go on to the duties of their day. As I must do now (it’s very early Tuesday morning as I write) ...
Hall clear!

Wendy said...

A girl is allowed to change her mind. And I am glad.

I had a meting at church last night, and we had a guest speaker. He has been with Jonnie Erickeson Tada over the last 1.5 years and when he spoke I thought of you. I came to the conclussion that God blesses people with tragedies, so that others can see there strength and go out into the world and make a difference. That's what I think he has done with your family. You have touched many many people with your stories and how GOD is the one that has made it possible for you to go on. Sorry to go on an on. I just wish everyone GOT IT. Don't You??
Wendy Myers
www.scrappinwithfriends.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

*Hi Jody* I just wanted to say that I've been enjoying your blog for around a month or two now. I've been sort of shy to comment..but can I just say...you are a true inspiration. I love how you talk so openly about your faith...your life..and just the every day things that life can bring. I just wanted to say thanks for being so real...it's a rare thing. :)

Anonymous said...

Life is about being flexible.

Anonymous said...

Jody......SOOOOO glad you are back.
I don't post that often, but I do read every day and sometimes several times a day.
You are an inspiration and I truly believe the words you write are God-inspired AND I believe your reasons for writing are to glorify God.
May you be blessed.
Thank you for coming back.
Sincerely,
Jackie Carl
Marion,lN

Anonymous said...

So did ya think she could stay away from comments for longer than a couple days? Even when she freely admits she got a ton more responses via e mail than comments! The email was private; this venue, again, provides the public adulation she craves. PS It's about time you started paying some attention to Chip. How long can a man be comfortable with the identity of "nitty-gritty spouse?" It evokes images of a guy with pink bows on his ears. He's a MAN for gosh sakes, not another charm or adornment for scrap pages.....

Christal said...

Great post Jody... Started to say that I was glad you were back, but you didnt go anywhere. Just happy that we have a place to speak and voice our opinions, and hang out on the "front porch". Freely!
Can someone please pass the coffee?!

mammathinks said...

It's still astonishing to me that anyone would even read a blog that supposedly "offends" them...but to each their own. I guess some people enjoy getting all riled up.

I'm glad you're not letting them win. What you have to say is something many more people benefit from, than are opposed to or offended by.

Anonymous said...

Annoying, I mean anonymous needs to take some grammar lessons herself. She really thinks she's smart doesn't she?
Rita

Shawnna Samples said...

Good for you
and for me too ;)

Anonymous said...

I am happy to see the comments reinstated... I (very) occasionally leave one but never anything worthwhile enough to warrant an actual email. I liked today's blog for your husband... from time to time I will write a blog "dedicated" to my own husband and he gets a bit embarassed because he is a rather private person. On a less self-conscious level, though, it makes him feel great :) BTW, I love the pictures you post, it is like looking through a photo album! Hope the rest of your week is great!

Anonymous said...

blogger has an option that doesn't allow for anonymous comments - one has to use a blogger account to comment. you could try that...

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