Sunday, November 25, 2007

That nose...





I had no intention of blogging today until moments ago. Now I cannot not blog, lest I forget. This is 'my baby', Ava. She is 3 and a half years old, but she is the youngest of my children, so she is my baby. Her birthday falls just 4 days before Teagan's birthday and so I find myself more and more 'comparing her' and recalling memories of Teagan the closer Ava gets to turning 4. Like this week, I was remembering what I did with Teagan on her last Thanksgiving and how grown up she seemed to me at that time. I find it strange that Ava {and Bella} have never known their older sister, and yet they sometimes tell stories 'about her' as if she were still around on earth today. It is a strange thing at times, and yet I consider it a blessing- there mere fact that we had Teagan in our lives was a blessing. The fact that she 'still is a part of our lives' is a gift.
The point of this post is for me- for remembering. Many of you are mom's yourselves and so you will probably relate to this or at least understand a bit if you're a parent. I went to tuck Ava in a bit more cozy as she was tossing and turning and whimpering in her sleep. I got up from the computer and as I tucked her in and patted her back to sleep I was overcome with how much love I have for her and how much more beautiful she seemed to me as she lay sleeping. Her nose and lips just seemed so perfect to me and well, truly there is nothing more sweet than a sleeping baby. Especially when it is your own.
I recalled the number of times I lay next to Teagan and how I loved to tuck her hair back from her face and I remember how many times I struggled to get her to sleep as a new baby...thinking I would die of exhaustion...but as soon as she was asleep I would want to hold her longer and just stare at her because I was mesmerized at her beauty and the fact that she was mine. I couldn't even grasp it at times how I got so lucky to have such a perfect baby girl.
I have felt the same for all of my kids- I have marveled at their features and thanked God for sending them into my life. I have wondered what I have done in life to deserve such gifts, and recognized that I will fall short and fail them all at times...they deserve perfection and yet God has chosen to send them to Chip and me. It's humbling.
Tonight as I stared at Ava sleeping awhile longer and listened to the rhythms of her breath, it made me stop and wonder all over again. I deserve nothing good in life, and yet I have thought about a long list of gifts in my life that I have to be thankful for this week. I have a life that is abundant and full. I don't stop often enough to take it all in.
I am making this post a reminder to myself to stop and take it all in. Every little feature. Every little breath. Life comes with no guarantees. I am thankful for so much, for memories that remind me of all that I have had, of all that surrounds me this moment. And I hope I will slow down and take it all in as it comes. Life is precious and priceless. And sometimes I forget to take such notice.

14 comments:

somebody,somewhere said...

thanks jody - it's bedtime for me here in the u.p. but going to take a peek and give another kiss to my precious gifts! :) glad as you are that THEY were given to ME and my hubby, and grateful to GOD for the GIFT of THEM!!

Anonymous said...

This is a little bit off topic, but I have been reading your blog for quite some time and enjoy it alot. However, I cannot help but notice that everything seems to be about your girls. If you take a look at the entries from the past few weeks there is maybe one pic of your son and the rest are all your daughters.
I am not sure what to think about this but maybe you should include him alot more.

paige said...

sweet jody-thank you so much for your beautiful note that i found on my blog this morning.
i have followed you & your story for quite some time (i've left a few comments here & there).
you are a living testimony to God's grace and how he can make beauty from ashes. you obviously are an amazing mommy to your precious children.
i have been blessed by your entries & i have learned much from YOU.
xo

Jody said...

Dear Anonymous~
I scrolled back through the blogposts that come up as the main page of Nitty.Gritty. is accessed. What I found was that Brock was pictured and mentioned in several posts, including our trip to the parade, in the 'silver-lining post', eating ice cream dots, on a scrap page about my favorite rock stars as well as Halloween. He is very much a part of my life, although he is at school everyday vs. my girls only 3 days a week, so obviously I spend more time with them and have more opportunities for photos. He happens to play outside/at friends because of his age and does one on one things with his dad...like raking leaves yesterday and throwing the lacrosse ball around. I appreciate your concern for him not getting 'equal airtime' on this blog, but I assure you he knows he is loved. In writing this blog I do not try to share all parts of my life equally. If it were true, I would surely have more posts about scrap products, buttercream and thoughts from the Scriptures. While I appreciate your concerns about this, you'll just have to trust me that my blog is more random than you would believe and my life isn't as narrow as it seems it is based on what I write here. I hope you can see past the inequalities here and find something of take-away value for your own life. Thank you for your comment and for noticing such details.
Sweetly~

Anne Marie said...

You are soooo humble and gracious. I found your blog through someone else a year ago - and whenever I need a good reality check, and a good reminder of God's love and strength and power, I always read here. You are so grounded and gifted and I am blessed to be able to share in your life journey. God bless you!

glo.riah said...

such adorable pics!!
you have so much to be grateful for, and i am constantly reminded (just by reading your words) that i do too.

xoxo

Laura S. said...

Love your pictures & your thoughts.
Thanks for sharing your insights & faith. As always I am taking away some new found gratitude & appreciation for God's gifts in my life.

This blog is always good for me when I need to get back on track.

Thanks!

Laura S. said...

Love your pictures & your thoughts.
Thanks for sharing your insights & faith. As always I am taking away some new found gratitude & appreciation for God's gifts in my life.

This blog is always good for me when I need to get back on track.

Thanks!

Anonymous said...

Jody,
I had to tell you this. We have been studying the book of Ruth in our Bible Study. Last week, we read the part where Boaz covers Ruth with his blanket as she sleeps at his feet. We learned that this is a picture of God's protection and "covering" over us. My wise leader (who has always encouraged us moms to gaze at our sleeping kids and be thankful for them), gave us a perfect picture of this. She said, "you know how you go into your child's room at night and rearrange the covers over them--it is such a tender gesture, and you do it out of deep, protective love for your children. Well, God does the same for us every day...he feels even more loving towards us as he covers us in so many ways."
I had to share this with you as I pictured you tucking your daughter in. I'm glad that you posted to remind yourself of that moment, and blessed us all in the sharing of it, as well. I sincerely thank you for your perspective and open heart for sharing.

Christa said...

Love the pictures and thoughts...

Anonymous said...

This is from one "anonymous" to another. If you were a long time reader of this blog I think you would see the spirit of Jody and which she shares here. Not to begin a negative dialogue here, but what she writes is from her inner-most thoughts 'at the time'. I've never, ever sensed a disparacy of "sharing" unequally anything here. I loved her humble response to you and though I've never personally met her I could sense the sting your post caused for her. Thank you Jody for portraying yourself as you do!!!

Anonymous said...

hi, isn't it amazing that God blessed you and the Cobles with children coincidentally after all your tragedy? It't just like the story in Job, he was blessed twice as much after his trials. I am also in that trial right now, the wound is fresh and painful and you are yet enother blessing of words to help give me strenth, thanks. Vanessa
ilovegiuliana.blog.com

Penny Smith said...

Jody... Wow. We never know, where blessings hide. I added you to my favorites on SIS, not knowing you had already impacted my life prior. I had prayed for you, and tried to understand your forgiveness and grace. But I didn't know then like I do know the power God really would have over my life... (my recommitment came later) it was a part of my journey, your story back then.
And yet I didn't know you were casually now part of my scrapbooking life. God is wonderful and mysterious. And your transparency is an incredible blessing.
Thank you for your willingness to share-good and bad.
And even as much of a blessing is that before I figured out I knew your story, I was always drawn to your attraction to fun, to your kindness (watched as you got together in crops and your fun goofy pictures)to your spirit... you are a testimony to the holy spirit by the way you live. Happiness is apparent, and that is such a blessing to see!
Thank God for you and your family!

Laura Williams said...

oh jody what PRECIOUS pictures!!!! i love them all!!!!! she really does have just the CUTEST nose!!!! ;)