Wednesday, September 19, 2007

I've tried just about everything...



and still I can't snap myself out of a bad mood today. I have no explanation for it. It has been in my system since I first awoke this morning. There was no 'drama' or chaos as Brock headed out for school and Chip out for work. I had my quiet time and it even spoke to my heart.
My girls have been their usual selves...all kissable and huggable and cute one minute, and leaving markers and bits of cut-up paper all over the floor the next. At lunch, after I had made a few different items just to make them each happy, I was feeling particularly down. For no reason...which is even further frustrating me. Bella decided that she wanted a sandwich too, and really I was not in the mood to make one more thing. But I told myself, "If Teagan were here you would give anything to make her a peanut butter and jelly sandwich", so I headed to the cupboard and grabbed the peanut butter and I made her a sandwich. Not just a sandwich...a puzzle/heart sandwich. I cut two small hearts into the bread with a cookie cutter. She was thrilled. Her excitement drew a bit of attention and the next thing you know I had to make one for Ava and Wyndham too. Still, their smiles and laughter and simple delight wasn't enough to feel back to my usual self. So, I put them in the tub after their meal. They were all freshly bathed and smelling clean and their hair was combed soft. The sun has been out and shining all day long. It is a beautiful fall day., the kind you hope for this time of year. Still, I couldn't snap out of my grumpy feeling.
Just as I was planning on heading out the door to pick up Brock and Wyndham from school and therapy respectively, Chip called to say he could swing by on his way back to work from meetings in the area and save me the trouble. Okay. That should do the trick, right?! It didn't. I feel terrible. I made a batch of zucchini bread and a flank steak marinating for dinner. I've got laundry done and my dishwasher has aload of clean dishes inside of it. Brock got a perfect score on his spelling test and life couldn't be more routine and happy. Yet something is missing today.
In spite of all I have to be thankful for...all the blessings I can see and feel...I'm just not feeling it.
And it makes me feel even worse. So, there you have it. A full-blown Nitty.Gritty. bad attitude- for no real reason at all.
I hope I have a great post soon telling you what it is that snapped me out of this. I can't begin to imagine what it's gonna take. All I know is I hope it happens soon, and in the meantime I guess I'm gonna have to blame the tail-end of the cold I've had. That's the only thing I have to explain it.

22 comments:

Jan Connair said...

"Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy."--Thich Nhat Hanh

Hope your day is getting better!

Julie said...

Hi, Jody. Maybe it's in the air in Michigan? I'm feeling EXACTLY the same way today. In a funk, but no explanation. I hope that things turn around for you soon!!

HUGS! Julie (from the SIS crop)

K :) Family Historian said...

I have had those exact same days and I am so thankful when I wake up the next day and see things differently. I think it is just a part of life to be stuck in an occasional funk. Hope it passes soon.

Ang said...

i must admit...
i'm a bit (selfishly) relieved to know that even you...one of the most persistently positive, grateful, generous people i know still have those kind of relentless feelings on occasion. that even though you are always able to have an attitude of thankfulness and hope...continually encouraging me to be more eternal in my thinking....that you are in fact still human :)

i do hope that the clouds clear soon for you. or better yet, that maybe they already have :)

praying for you.

Anonymous said...

You just hang in there and ride it out. It will pass. Even in a bad mood, you are still one of the most inspiring people I have ever met. Thank you for posting even about bad moods because it makes us feel like we are not alone when we feel that same way. I hope you are getting some sunshine your way. Kristi from Cropper Hopper

Sonja said...

Oh girl, I get these all the time (and I have to say usually thoughts of you and your sunshine bring me out of it) I try to just take it for what it is (a little blue funk) and pray it won't last too long, and that in no time I'll be busting my buttons in...um pride, yeah, that's it.

Susan said...

I told my neighbor this morning that I wanted to "Take a day off from life" nothing sounded better than to just lay in bed with a good book and chill out. Too bad for me that my 11 month old and 2 year old didn't agree with my plan!

S SImpson

Just Me said...

Hope you can get a good night's rest and that helps with the "funk"...I'm definitely hoping that will help mine.

Anonymous said...

thank you, thank you, thank you! i'm struggling with a "funk" today too, ready to snap at family & co-workers, angry about a situation that i have NO control over, generally not a "nice" person! thanks for letting us know you have those days too! here's praying for a better tomorrow for everyone! :) thanks again for your honesty! :)

hollybird said...

Read Psalm 40. Meditate on it. Write it out in your own words. We aren't the first to have those days when we need to be pulled out of the mud and the mire. He is always faithful... even when there is no "reason". I spent a great deal of time this morning giving Him my "just because" feelings too! I pray for you often. Blessings on you Jody.

Anonymous said...

everyone has a bad day once in awhile.
mine was yesterday.
rose

Tara said...

I had one of those days yesterday and because of my sad, angry, feeling sorry for myself kind of mood, my daughter ended up having a not-so-great day too! It kind of just rubbed off on her.
In the peace and quiet of my home last night, after the kids headed to bed, I sat in my bedroom chair with a cup of coffee and the Bible and just read and prayed. I jumped all over the place in my Bible and in my prayers for that matter, but I did go to bed feeling a bit better and today, Thank God, was a much better day!

Wade, Melanie, & kids said...

I have the sinus mess right now and I have been in a funk tonight as well. Hope you feel better soon. Melanie Smith (Brandon, MS)

Rosie said...

The seasons are changing. Most people are not aware of how this affects moods. Seasonal Affective Disorder(SAD) often affects people beginning in September. It doesn't have to be a full blown depression. Often it is a "funk". The days are getting shorter-the nights longer. Therefore you are not having as much sunlight reach your eyes. This in turn means that you are not having as much Seritonin created in your brain. When you have a lack of seratonin you feel sluggish, irritable, just "wrong". You have too much melatonin which is the sleepy hormone.
Go outside in the morning and get some sunshine, really absorb it. It should help!

nicole q said...

Sounds like my day yesterday.
Nothing was out of the ordinary... I just 'woke up on the wrong side of the bed' as I call it.
Bad mood for no reason. I HATE that. Makes me feel even more horrible than I'm already feeling.
But woke up today and was back to my usual self. I guess we all have them from time to time.
Hopefully tomorrow is better!

Lynne said...

I hope that the cloud clears soon. I think we all have days like that which at times is very helpful to be reminded of.

Sherri P said...

Hi Jody, No words of wisdom, but we can all relate. Hopefully ridding yourself of this cold, and a good night's sleep, will get you feeling more like yourself. We're certainly all allowed to have these kinds of days! Hang in there and feel better!!

Julie said...

Hi Jody!
This really caught my attention as yesterday would have been Emma's first birthday. I'm sure you can relate to the feelings I was having of 'for everyone else, this is just another normal, typical, beautiful fall-like day, but for us...' and then I read that it wasn't for you. I'm sorry that it wasn't, but it really helped me to remember that we just never know what someone else is thinking or feeling at any particular moment. Anyway, I hope you are feeling better and thanks for sharing - you really do keep it real!

Heather said...

Yeah I hear ya, I get that way sometimes too. I usually head for chocolate then scrapbooking. Creating makes me happy and thankful.

Gigi said...

hey jody!! hope your crappy mood turned itself around...sending you smiles from new york!!!!

& just so you know...i've been in that mood all week...knowing that i'm not the only one helped me a bit...maybe it'll help you too? i hope so...love you!!!

xoxoxoxo

gi

motherkearney said...

Sorry you feel this way... it's normal, and it's okay.

Laurie said...

Sending big hugs and prayers your way. I've had the same funk going for a bit lately. Trying to take comfort in all the little things like you and looking for where and what I'm missing.