Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Comments=Too much Nitty.Gritty. Drama...for now.

We arrived home late last night. Safe and sound. We're all a little bit worn out from 12+ hours of driving and sitting, and now the facing the fun of unpacking 6 people's stuff and getting back to our routine of life.
Back to school.
Back to sleeping in our own beds.
Back to eating balanced meals.
Back to dial-up.
I guess back to reality! =)
By the way...had some 'comment drama' here a few posts ago. I do not need more "drama" in my life, so as of today, this will be my final post in which I will allow comments. If you have something you are dying to tell me, please do so now. I have decided that since the comments waste my time and use up energy that I could put into something else...like scrapping pages or cleaning my closets or making buttercream icing...and they are always left 'Anonymously', then it's just not worth my time having any comments for now.
If there are thoughts or ideas or other things that pop up that you feel are worth my time and energy, then you can always email me. {nitty.grittyjody@yahoo.com} You know I love mail anytime. That way any 'Anonymous' comment-type people will have to be a little more brazen...and I will get a chance to email them back...or post their email address so that all of us can write them back at any time. Seems fair to me.
SO, that's my Nitty.Gritty. decision for now. I have been very fair and open, but as I've said before, this blog is mostly about me wanting to just share myself with myself, my family, and others who happen to find my link. I have enjoyed the two-way dialogue and have made a lot of new "friends" along the way. I will keep blogging for now. And I look forward to getting more email.
Off to do some unpacking. Thanks for all the great comments up 'til now. Leave your last one here today...if you want...and if you have wireless internet, I'd love to know who you get it through and how much you pay for this service. Just doing some Nitty.Gritty. price-comparisons. =)

47 comments:

Kari said...

Welcome home Jody and family! I am glad you are safe and sound. By the way, you can block anonymous users from leaving comments on your blog. Just a thought. I am sorry to hear that it has come to this. Remember, I love your blog and read it everyday. Good luck!!!

cara harjes said...

Kari beat me to it! I was going to suggest the same thing. But I agree, i bet it takes a lot of time and energy - even reading the positive posts. Plus all of the email correspondance it sounds like you have going on!
Boundaries . . . a tricky, but important thing! I always think I have them down, then i find myself telling a client, "I don't normally go into the office on fridays, but i guess i could see you this once." That Dr. Phil might be right about a thing or two. We do teach people how to treat us.
Good job on the never ending learning curve of life!
Have a great day.

Cara

K :) said...

As always love your blog and totally understand your decision to remove the comment section. Our internet connection is through Time Warner Cable and we bundle it with telephone and cable tv. The cost is $132 a month for all three. Have a super duper day.

Anonymous said...

Well considering that you live in/near Grand Haven (my favorite city, we visit there every weekend to go look at the lake) I'm guessing you have Charter Cable for your provider??... I'm not sure how much they are, but here in Grand Rapids I have Comcast, I pay a little less than $60 per month (inc taxes and everything) and that includes my Internet and really basic cable. I have been really happy with their service and when I have ever had a problem they are ALWAYS really fast to fix it even if it is at 2am. I know right now comcast is having some really good deals as well (12 months for really cheap) .... IF you have a land line phone I would look into DSL, through AT&T I know they offer a Landline, Cell phone, Direct TV, Internet package at a pretty good package deal. If I had use for a land line phone I would probably go that route, but since everyone I know is on my cell plan (free in calling) and my kids are still young we are currently on wireless service only.
Good luck .. now that we have highspeed internet I honestly don't know how I lived without it, going back to dailup would be torture for me.

Thanks Jody,
I love coming to your blog for my daily dose of joy :)! I'm gonna miss the comments, I have found some other really great blogs from them... oh well, I understand the need to eliminate added drama from your life... I recently have done that myself :) and feel ohh so much better for it!

CyndiAKADisneyqueen said...

Glad you guys are home safe and sound..as for the rest...do what you have to do. Its your blog and you should be able to enjoy it without a lot of drama. Life can do that all by itself. You sure don't need it from perfect strangers (lol).

Anonymous said...

Good for you! Great decision. None of us need any negativity crud cluttering up our spirits.. especially when it's done covertly. yuck.

glad to hear you're home- good luck with the laundry!
www.xanga.com/hippmama

Adrienne said...

Jody, like the ladies mentioned above, boundaries are good. I've had a lot of "anonymous" blog drama lately and it's really eye opening. Seriously, it's your blog. The fact that people judge you or "offer" advice is astounding when done anonymously. I try to just laugh or pray for the person...thankfully God knows who they are since they aren't bold enough to offer their opinion along with their name! Anyway, after some pretty crummy comments recently, Jason suggested I take off the comments altogether, but I'm always in awe of the random lives that have been touched by Noah's story, so I don't want to discourage that. The beauty of being the author is in the power to hit the delete button. I'm kinda liking it!

Anyway, enjoy the space and freedom from the drama for now...

I'll keep checking in and praying for you and your family...
Adrienne

Krista said...

I am new and yet love the comments, but I had to eliminate the Anonymous because there was some getting through from people trying to tell me there was "no God" it was scarey! you can also privatize your blog and only allow certain users to access it! I love your site-You inspire me!

Anonymous said...

Jody:
I don't know how to be anything but anonomous since I don't have a blog, but I do love to read your comments.
We have high speed internet, but not wireless. It runs us about $34 a month and it's through cox our cable company.
I've wanted to switch to wireless but heard it's not as secure, not sure if that's right or not.
Looking forward to hearing what you did at MOA etc since we leave in about 3 weeks.
Welcome Home.
Jill from Omaha

Anonymous said...

Hey Jody,
Glad you all are home safe. I guess I'm technically a lurker--but I just have to say that I love visiting your blog--it is challenging, inspiring and often just what I needed to hear. Thanks for giving us a way to still communicate with you. I'm not from your area but we pay $20 a month through verizon for DSL. I know--we are the only bizzare people in the world with no cell phone or cable or anything. It is my boundary against too much drama!(though I do love my internet) Hugs to you and I hope you only have good drama in the future.
Rebecca Wood

Anonymous said...

I read Nitty Gritty daily and as I've told you before...I love it!You really help me to keep perspecitve on life and enjoy every moment I have with my kids. It's a shame that a few bad apples have to spoil it for the whole bunch! I'm sure however, that without comments you probably will have a little more time on your hands!! Don't be surprised if you get an e mail from me every now and then! I think of you as a friend even though we've never met!Oh, and high speed internet~ROCKS! We bundle ours with Time Warner Cable...phone(free long distance), cable and internet a little over $130 a month for all three. Hope that helps!

Anonymous said...

Hey Jody! I have to admit, I've been a lurker for the past, oh, seven or eight months=) I found your blog through Whitney Cerak's and have been reading it ever since. You are such an inspiration to me! I'm a sophomore in college, and I can only hope that someday I can be the woman of God you are! Your family is absolutely beautiful- they're so blessed to have you! I'll keep reading your blog, but I just thought I'd pop in while I could! Hope you're enjoying the (rare) Michigan sun!
~Stephanie

Anonymous said...

jody-
i have at+t high speed dsl and i pay
about $45.00 a month for that, which includes my local phone service. i use quest for (unlimited) long distance, and my bill for that is always under $10.00 a month.
i want to thank you again for your prayers for kelsey and her family.
you are truly an angel, and so wise for one so young. i will never, ever forget you..
love ya,
rose

kelle grogan said...

will you post your recipe for buttercream frosting?? please????

Shawnna Samples said...

emailed ya :D
also on the internet stuff - we have Time Warner DSL and it runs about 33 bucks -- we have the digital phone, digital cable, and dsl all for the package price of 99 dollars --

Whitney said...

I've never commented before, but I just found your blog about two weeks ago. I've gone back to the very first post & read. Anyways, it's saddening that there are people in this world with nothing better to do. But really, all I'm commenting for is to let you know, I think you are amazing and you have inspired me.

Lisa said...

Even if I can't leave a comment - you'll know I'm still here reading. I hate that you have to do this - but I totally understand. No need for the drama!! Lots of Love!!!

Anonymous said...

Remembering the old Jack Nicholson line....

"You can't handle the truth"

Avoidance is bliss

Valerie said...

so glad you're home.
so sad it has to come to this.
good for you, though...it's the best way to deal with the schmucks who can't say anything nice (but still feel they have to say something!)!

Anonymous said...

Jody, I'm anonymous and a lurker, but I do read you every single day and come away a better person through reading your story. I understand about the comments, but please continue to blog. I go through withdrawal when you miss even a single day! Oh, and thank you for taking us to MN! Glad to hear you are home safe!

Susan in Indiana

Anonymous said...

Jody:

You are the one who chose to make your blog "public". You deal with those consequences. Discontinue the comments and you discontinue opportunities for different thoughts, points of view, etc. Some people may want to remain anonymous. It does not make them "bad", only vulnerable. Read up on the studies of "fame addition" and look at yourself. God bless you and your journey. Then, look into your heart in an honest, seeking manner. Please take care. YOu have issues.

Anonymous said...

Judy who ever left those two anonymous comments have their own issues they have yet to deal with. Maybe they need to take a good look in the mirror at themselves. I think you and your family are incredibly strong people and that is just from finding your blog a week ago. We are so different yet carry a similar experience on forgivenes. Just different topics. Check my website out at www.erinmerryn.com and you'll know what I am talking about.
I e-mailed you at another e-mail address I found for you and your husband it had both your names in it. I hope you got it.
Erin

Anonymous said...

Jody: Just wanted to take the opportunity to leave a final comment, although you can bet I will keep in touch via email. Although I was surprised by your decision to not have comments, I totally respect it. I do hope that you will continue to blog, because there are so many people out there who want to hear your wisdom and who so much appreciate it (me included). Wanted to share a few quick things - Watched your family on Lifetime over the weekend and was so glad that you passed that onto us. It was good to hear your and Chip's perspective once again. Thanks for sharing.
Also, in follow up to our nitty.gritty valentines inspiration. We made cookies and decided to share them with our neighbors. My oldest daughter (4) and I delivered our treats in sub zero temps to several families on our street. The response we got over a few cookies was much more than I imagined. We got to visit with some of them and we left other treats for those who weren't home. Although I didn't expect it we received thanks by phone or by mail from those who we didn't personally see that day. Wow! My thought in doing it nitty.gritty style wasn't for thanks, but to pass on some love and I guess we accomplished that. It is true that small things really can make a difference. We're already planning what we want to do for "next" time. Take Care. Love you Friend. Heidi S. from Gaylord.

Jaena said...

I love your blog, Jody, and am sorry about the anonymous comment issue. I don't allow anonymous comments because I feel like if people can't put their name with their ideas or thoughts, they are not worth hearing. My husband and I spent several years in paid church ministry and saw the damage that anonymous letters or rumors can do, so I've had strong opinions regarding this topic for some time. :)

Thanks for allowing us the privilege of learning from you. God is using you to touch so many of us ! :)

Jaena said...

I forgot...our DSL is through AT&T and runs about $50 a month which includes local phone, caller ID, and 3-way calling. My husband said that you can usually get an introductory rate for the first year of around $15 a month when they run specials.

Anonymous said...

Hi, Jody,

I hate that you feel the necessity of turning off the comments, but I can totally understand why. I guess my last words to you are....girl, you DESERVE high-speed internet! I cannot imagine how you do what you do with a dial-up connection. If you have cable TV, I bet your company offers a package that will give you a discount if you purchase both services. Mine does. I'll still be tuning in daily. Peace!

Anonymous said...

Hey Jody,

As someone who has gotten to know you personally I had to respond. Especially to you favorite "anonymous" writers. First, to the one who said you can't handle the truth, they couldn't even sign their name talk about not handling the truth! Second, the same person said "avoidance is bliss" Jody is not avoiding anything or anyone, did you miss the part where she gave you her e-mail address. Dig deep, find YOUR truth and e-mail with your NAME.

To the second anonymous person, who doesn't have issues? I challenge you to send an e-mail, seriously, open your mind and let her respond to YOU! Just listen and see if you can't learn something!

Jody, You are one of the most giving, balanced, and FAITHFUL person I think I have ever met! Thanks so much for your openess and giving all of us at Church and School the opportunity to KNOW you and learn from you! And yeah, your screwed-up, So am I and everyone else. Fortunately, Some of us are blessed enough to know that God has taken care of our "little" problems! Thanks, Jody

Julie

Anonymous said...

Jody, was just introduced to your blog late last week...spent most of the weekend reading your archives. You are an amazing Christian witness and are very inspiring to me. God Bless you and your family. I will continue to enjoy your blog as long as it is here and may even drop you a line or two sometime via email.
Sherrie; Wichita, Kansas

Lisa Leonard said...

Jody, sorry you are having to deal with people who leave inappropriate comments--maybe they have too much time on their hands or they envy the joy you have found?! I read your blog consistently and will continue to. We've also been through some hard things and have come to realize that although life is very painful, there is so much joy to be had! I appreciate your story, your honesty and transparency. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

There have been several historical studies on how everyday individuals who have been exposed to small but signficant amounts of public fame become relatively "addicted". This is not a joke, but an absolute studied trend. And when the "fame" flame does not continue to be fed, the person(s) will notch up the degree to which they wish attention simply to get the same "high". Jody, this blog may have been started "just for you" but the amount and level of adulation that has come back to you from it is enormous. I'd only advise that you step back and decide what is your true motive: To express yourself or to be honored and acknowledged as much as possible. Being "queen" feels good. It is quite a "high". But it will fade unless you keep "igniting" it with things and that is your trap. The hard part of your new journey will be to close off all the adulation shown and expressed in these comments........

Anonymous said...

Hi, I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoy your blog. I read it every night and when I feel down it really gives me a lift. My children are grown now and I love seeing what you and your family are doing and thinking back on when my own were young. You have been a great inspiration to me.

Please don't let a few that have jealousy issues spoil your fun.

Linda in Kentucky

Julie said...

Jody,
I never would have heard of your story if it weren't for comments you left on another blog. As I stated previously, you are an inspiration to us all. I also completely understand your decision to put an end to comments, especially the anonymous ones. It's not easy to express true emotion through cyber space, but you do a great job of putting yours into words. Having just entered into the world of blogging, I am hesitant with my own site for that reason, but at least we have the power to remove hurtful comments!
Good for you for doing what feels right. I sometimes have to take several days off from the computer, as it is so easy and time consuming to get sucked into other peoples life stories. There are definitely good things and bad things related to technology and grieving in today's world!
Anyway, glad to hear you will still continue blogging!

Take care!

Julie from Colorado
www.emmakatespage.blogspot.com

Bethany said...

I just came across your blog recently and love it. I am glad you will still be posting and understand your need to turn off comments. It is obvious in this post alone. Obviously your rude annonymous commenters don't really BELIEVE what they say or they would put their name where their mouth is. If they don't like what you have to say why do they come to your site?????? I have read blogs I don't agree with or like and if I don't feel like they are a good use of my time I stop reading and visiting that site. Not spamming them with hate comments. It just shows what type of person they are to spend so much energy on something negative...obviously they have issues with bitterness and hate and jealousy. And since they like movie quotes I say to them from Anne of Green Gables " I will not be poisned by your bitterness"

So good for you. I will keep reading and think what you are writing is a great encouragement to others. Having gone through pain and loss and trials myself I know there is no way to DEAL with it without God and God uses all pain and trials for my good so I can face the future on a positve note knowing I have a hope greater than what is in this world. Big Hugs to you.

Anonymous said...

I have loved your blog from the first day I found it. Love the way you express yourself and enjoy reading about your family. And I will continue to read your blog no matter what! Thank you for your inspirational words! Blessings to you and to your wonderful family!!!

Tammy

Anonymous said...

Two comments I'd like to point out...

Remembering the old Jack Nicholson line....

"You can't handle the truth"

Avoidance is bliss.

Jody:

You are the one who chose to make your blog "public". You deal with those consequences. Discontinue the comments and you discontinue opportunities for different thoughts, points of view, etc. Some people may want to remain anonymous. It does not make them "bad", only vulnerable. Read up on the studies of "fame addition" and look at yourself. God bless you and your journey. Then, look into your heart in an honest, seeking manner. Please take care. YOu have issues.


Truer words have never been spoken. A lot of people choose to remain anonymous so our blogs don't get a ton of hate mail just because we have a different point of view than all you holy rollers on here.

You know what? You're the one losing out. No one says you have to read all the comments.

And while we're at it...why not quit blogging? I am sure that takes up precious scrapping time or time you could be spending with your family.

Maybe if you didn't have to code things, post pictures, and change font colors too, that would save time.

Hell, for someone that has a nanny -- can afford to sip Starbucks whenever the hell she wants to, and spends precious time on all these "lavish" junk -- more power to you.

You just use us all as a sound board, don't ya, princess?

Signed, Yet another reader you have chosen to offend by your meaningless rants and posts.

Anonymous said...

Now the hubby is pissed. To the last writer...why on earth do you read the blog if you don't like it. Don't hide behind "people like to be anonymous because they do not want hate mail on their blog" because that is what you are doing. If you feel you need to tell Jody something like this, e-mail her, she will respond and not share it with the world. Or, be a stand up person and call me on my cell 616-402-8325 and I will give you an answer. But more than likely you will choose to be a coward. That is all right, the world needs those two. I am by the way breaking all the rules of everything I tell Jody in not responding to attacks. By the way we think we know who you are anyway.
Signed,
Chip (aka nitty gritty hubby)

Anonymous said...

Yawn, Yawn, Yawn.

"The world needs those two"

Chip: Brush up on your grammar: Two means (2).
Too means, "also".

Anonymous said...

I have to put my two cents in here. I love this blog, I have only been reading it for a week or so, but have really been inspired by Jody, and how she handles her life. The person who posted above maybe should think about who really has the "fame addiction". It seems like they may get their jollies from attention, good or bad. I've only been a silent reader up until now, but I will reiterate how much I love reading your blog Jody. Good luck to you and your family!!!

Nichole from Lowell, MI

Unknown said...

Wow! Anonymous has a bee up her #*^$!! I am brand new to your blog!~ but loving it! Especially how changing the colors makes 'buttercream' stand out! :)LOL

Your outlook on life is an inspiration.... I'll keep reading! That is just the great thing about life! You can choose to read or not to read!! Best wishes to you and your whole family!!!

Anonymous said...

Jody, please forgive me for using your comment section to say a few things to fame addicted Ann Onymous. First of all, Jody isn't a princess, she's a saint. She could be a queen however, as God has a mansion waiting for her in heaven, by far greater than earthly royalty could even dream of. I suggest you get a journal and write down your anger/despair/negativity issues and lay them at the foot of the cross and ask Jesus to come into your heart. You could truly be happy then and maybe stop harrassing people. God will love you even if no one else does. Be nice to people on their way up or you'll meet them on your way down. GET A LIFE AND GET GOD IN IT BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE. Oh, by the way, thanks for the Holy Roller remark. I consider that a compliment! God bless you and your wonderful family, Jody and Chip. Rita

Cris said...

Wow Jody. I am so sorry that you are having to deal with such rudeness.

To the two anonymous posters who chose to be insulting. I understand not agreeing with certain viewpoints and wanting to state your difference of opinions, but name calling goes too far. If you don't agree with Jody's decision to put her trust and faith in God and how she chooses to look at life, fine. But the least you can do is to do it respectfully.

Amy T Schubert said...

Hey Jody -- sorry people are rotten. So not worth your time. I think you're awesome!
xo
-A

Anonymous said...

good idea, jody!!! i think that is a smart choice.

stacy said...

i am so grossed out by such childishness. we are women (most of us). we as women need to take care of eachother and respect eachother not put eachother down. i don't care what religion you are or no religion at all. we need to be supportive a care about eachother as a group.

grow up and remember that this is jodys space and if you don't like what she has to say than get out.

as a mother i know that sometimes i just need a place to say what i feel. this is jodys place to do that. as a mother i also know that i don't always have the support i need at home (even though i have an amazing husband) but my blog is a nice place to just say how i feel or display things or people that i'm proud of
where i know that i'll be respected.

i know that you know that if you can't say something nice than don't say anything at all. well this is one of those times. jody is a good person and isn't being hurtful or unkind to anyone she is just a woman, mother, wife and most importantly a child of god and she diserves respect as the rest of us do.

i really think that this sad person who is so negative just has a rough life and can't find the peace in life that you have and is just jealous, that's ok and we are all sorry for you but keep it to yourself or try to ask jody how she has found peace or just REALLY read her words of wisdom.

jody i'm so sorry that people are so mean and spiteful.

cara harjes said...

"i don't care what religion you are or no religion at all. we need to be supportive a care about eachother as a group.
grow up and remember that this is jodys space and if you don't like what she has to say than get out."

I AGREE THAT WOMEN NEED TO SUPPORT EACH OTHER AS A GROUP. BUT I DON'T SEE ANY OF THIS "SUPPORT" IN TELLING SOMEONE TO "GET OUT".

SUPPORT (OR GRACE) CAN BE EXTENDED TO EACH OTHER, EVEN WHEN WE DON'T AGREE . . . . EVEN WHEN WE FEEL OFFENDED OR HURT. THAT IS TRUE SUPPORT (GRACE).

WHEN IT IS GIVEN TO PEOPLE WE LOVE AND RESPECT AND LIKE . . . WELL, THAT IS LOVELY . . . BUT REALLY, IT IS JUST . . . EASY.

Anonymous said...

proverbs tells us not to waste our wise words (as it says "pearls") on swine....do not waste time giving words of wisdom to those who will trample it under their feet and not learn and grow from it. choosing to not reply and choosing to shut off the comments is a way to heed this wisdom of proverbs. the wasted time, energy and negative thoughts on both parts is destructive and pulls people down. "whatsoever things are pure, honorable, or praiseworthy; think on such things...."

antiworm said...

Thank you for being such an inspiration to me and others around you.
I enjoyed reading your articles. This is truly a great read for me. I have bookmarked it and I am looking forward to reading new articles.