In the Headlines...

I have been thinking a lot lately about some of the news stories that capture our hearts and attention from day to day. I do not watch a lot of tv (besides childrens' programming) and I sometimes feel like I am out-of-touch with what's going on in the world around me. Many of you moms can probably empathize with me...life spins around us and demands enough attention. Why worry about what's happening somewhere else in the world?
Well, I have gotten some emails and have been engaged with some blogs recently in which people have had their lives changed so suddenly. I can relate to that. Six years ago, I was sitting home with a newborn (barely 5 pound baby) and a not-quite 2-yr old, and not-quite 3-yr old. My life was consumed with just staying on top of their needs and demands for my time, my body (loving, nursing, cuddling, getting no sleep, etc.) and I can say I felt happy, but definitely not concerned with life outside my little world.
I had no clue that in just 10 days from then, the events in my little world were about to begin to unwind. I was totally unprepared for the day when Wyndham would turn blue, stop breathing, and be airlifted downstate to Hurley Hospital. I was naive to the fact that life could actually demand my whole being- just to survive emotionally. I was living a quiet, happy life...and although I was loving it- being a busy Mom, pulled in all directions all day long- I know I didn't fully appreciate those routine days.
Then, after Wyndham's breathing ordeal (she spent 5 days in ICU on a ventilator, and then was sent home on an oxygen/heart monitor, which she grew 'out of' after 3 months), I was more sensitive and appreciative of all that I had. I soaked in my 'ordinary life' every minute. I thanked God for sparing Wyndham's life and I think I thought I had lived through the 'worst' that life could throw my way.
As we all know, I was painfully wrong. Almost six months to the day, all three of my children lay in beds at Hurley Hospital in critical condition, and Chip was listed in serious condition. I could hardly believe the reality of what was happening.
It didn't fully 'hit me' until I saw my name and pictures on the front page of our local newspaper. I remember someone had brought some copies of the paper to the hospital, and when I picked them up to read accounts of what had happened, a feeling of disbelief came over me. It was surreal. I find it interesting that although I was living the events out at that time, that it took headlines to make it real to me.
It hits me over and over again, now, when I see or hear other heartbreaking or attention-grabbing headlines. I always imagine the families at the 'other end' of the headlines and how they must be feeling or reacting. Like a local family dealing with the death of a dad and two kids, while 2 sons remain hospitalized. I saw the pictures of the 4 year old girl on paper yesterday, and my heart ached for the Mom who was picking up that same paper and having it sink in that this was her life now.
Or on the flip-side, the recent findings of a kidnapped boy after 4 and a half years of being missing. I'm sure his family would have never, ever believed a week ago, that they would be 'headline news' after finding their son alive and well. It would have been unbelievable to conceive that before it happened, and yet it did.
It sometimes makes me wonder what the rest of my life holds. I'm sure if I were to read the 'headlines' of the future stories of my life, that I would find some of them as unbelievable as the ones that have happened already. Yet, I do not worry or fear what my life holds. I am grateful to know that I have comfort and peace no matter what may come my way. I am especially thankful that people that came to offer sympathies and words of hope, the ones that said, 'You and Chip will have to create a "new normal" in your life now', were right and we have found a "new normal" in life.
I guess these thoughts come out of the events of my life at the moment, in which Chip and I have been putting together some materials to organize the "Teagan Ferlaak Memorial Charity Pro-Am". I redesigned our foundation letterhead and created a new logo for the event. It just hits me each time, how crazy it is that this is MY life...I have a logo and foundation in memory of my deceased daughter. Yet, it is an amazing thing to see how this has shaped my life, drives the way I live and face my day-to-day happenings, and continues to give me {us} reason to do good in the lives of others- in honor and memory of Teagan. I love that.
My challenge for you would be to 'imagine the headlines' of your life for a moment. Can you? Would you want to know what they say? Are you prepared for whatever may come your way? We don't all get to choose what happens to us. That's been the fact of all of our lives...the choice comes in how we respond to those events. I know some of you have a strong faith and a very real peace in life. But if you don't, I encourage you to seek it, before life comes at you with something unexpected. We ALL face pain...and death at some point.
I am happy to say that Chip and I have been given the opportunities to 'rise above' our pain, hurt and tragedy, and define our lives in terms of the living we have done since Teagan's death. I think that is the headline that surprises and humbles me the most.