Saturday, July 29, 2006

That day...



Here is a picture of the Old Depot restaurant as it looked when Chip and I pulled up to it on Sunday, July 29th, 2001. It was a small building- about 100 years old. Our family sat together at the first table, just inside the front door.
Teagan and Brock were sharing an order of Chocolate Chip Pancakes, and all was well in our life for a few brief moments into our brunch. The sun was shining and the day couldn't hardly have been more ordinary and perfect.
In fact, earlier that morning as I got Teagan dressed for church, I spun her around after tying her hair back in a ribbon, and I looked at her and said, "Teagan, you look more beautiful than I ever remember you looking before." I pulled her close for a tight hug and she said to me with a big grin on her face, "I know, Mommy." She was wearing the dress and ribbon in her hair that you see in this post.
I can't help but think about how much I wish I could change the events of this day. And yet, I live with no regrets. I know that Teagan knew she was loved as much as any person can be. I know that we had no way of knowing that something so terrible would come our way just by going out for Sunday brunch. I know that God could have changed the outcome of what happened to all of us there that day. I also realize things could have been much worse, and I am lucky that none of the rest of us injured were paralyzed or burned or any other number of horrible things happened. It was bad enough.
Yet, here I am five years later telling you that on most days you wouldn't have a clue that any of this actually happened in my life or the lives of my family members. We have recovered to the point where we live life with blessing and joy and lots of ordinary moments strung between. We have had our faith tested, and deepened. Life has given us unspeakable challenges, and somedays we still face them head on. Without God, I don't know how our family would look today. I thank Him for his healing in our hearts and lives, and the way that He has helped us move through the tough times. I am thankful that there is a Heaven and that Teagan is there waiting for a grand reunion with all of us someday.
Yes. Today marks another year of living, loving, learning, and pressing on to that day. I'm now 5 years closer to seeing Teagan again!

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have always wondered what good can come out of bad things. You and your family are a prime example of turning terribly bad things into amazingly good things! You are what so many people in this world strive to be (unbreakable) and have what so many people strive for (peace within). May the Lord be with you and your family today and Teagan's spirit shine down upon you. God bless you~
Tammy in Michigan

Valerie said...

what happened to your family is just one more things i'm adding to my list to ask the Lord about when i get where i'm going.

even tho' some of those scars will never heal, the greatest blessing, like you said, is that Teagan will be waiting for you at the gates.

prayers & hugs for you today!

Amanda said...

You're so right...I don't know how any family can survive such a thing without knowing God. I can't wait to meet Teagan in Heaven...I can tell by your posts that she was just precious.

shawnna said...

prayers for you and yours on this day -- i wish i could say that it gets easier with time -- but i haven't found that to be true -- Just stay focused on the prize at the end of life -- HEAVEN and the REUNIONS we will have with our little ones who are already there -- i hope you know that you have DEEPLY TOUCHED and CHANGED many of us with your story --

love
Shawnna

Anonymous said...

I just started reading your blog a few weeks ago....from the first post I read you have continuously inspired me. I pray that the Lord grants you some type of Peace today, that you feel his overwhelming love for you and your family. Thank you for sharing your precious Teagan with us. You are in my thoughts and prayers. God bless you.

A friend in Boyne

Jennifer said...

Hi Jody & family,

Just wanted you to know I was thinking of you today. It's hard to believe five years have gone by. We're praying for all of you.

~Jennifer

Jan said...

Oh, Nitty, all I can say is bless your heart.

Megan said...

Jody-

I'm thinking of you and your family today.

Megan

Carrie said...

Thinking of you today. Thank you for sharing your life, your story, your faith, and yourself with us. Love you, Jody.

Amy Schubert said...

xo

Anonymous said...

Your words are so moving and inspirational. I wish you could share this with the world - all of your amazingness! :) You should seriously consider publishing your works. I look forward to my morning breakfast, so I can sit at the computer, and get some nourishment with a side of Nitty Gritty! Thank you for sharing everyday. You are a blessing.

Suezi said...

Blessings to you and your family. It is with only God's power that we are able to survive such heinous events in our lives and come out with such grace and love. You have inspired so many and I can only think that Teagan is up above saying 'yep, that is my Mom, she's the greatest!!"
thanks for being so nitty gritty!!!!

Portia said...

May God continue to bless you with love. Thank you for sharing your story and continuing to inspire so many of us Nitty.Gritty. readers.

Big Hugs to the entire Ferlaak family!

--Portia

moki said...

We lost my mother in law almost 2 years ago in a motorcycle accident and from the beginning we recognized God's hand in the whole matter. How certain things had to be just a certain way for them to happen the way they did. And that there is something (spiritual) to that.

I feel that my hubby and I are so lucky to find "that" in the tragedy, I am sad that it can't be that way for everyone.

It's an unfortunate thing to lose someone and not have faith or hope.

Sheila said...

WOW! I have never met you, but linked to you through Whitney's blog, and have been touched every day. As I went through the "normal-ness" of my day yesterday, you were often brought to my mind, and brought before our LORD in prayer. How awesome that even though we are "strangers" here on earth, we serve the same GOD, and I am confident that HE was near and dear to you yesterday - keep on inspiring us to love our husbands and kids just a little bit more each day, and to continue striving for that day when we too, will meet your precious Teagan :)

manababies said...

I was thinking of you and your family last Saturday, and I regret not being able to comment earlier. Despite this tragedy you and your family faced, you are so positive and upbeat... truly an inspiration to so many people.

Elizabeth said...

The entire Ferlaak family--on earth and in heaven--continue to inspire and remind us all of what love means.

cheryl said...

i don't even know what to say. there are tears streaming down my face...i can't even imagine.

Peg Graham said...

I just have to let you know that I re-read this post twice in hopes to gain some of your amazing strength. Your words are so powerful and I thank you for sharing pieces of your life. (It helps me find a calm spot in my heart).

Best wishes for a beautiful life!
Peg Graham