I've been getting lots of emails and occasional comments in which people tell me that their biggest fear is something bad happening to their child(ren). They go on to share that I am an inspiration or encouragement to them that I have lived through such tragedy and still maintain a positive outlook on life.
So this is what hits me today while I am reading such a note. I am living a lot of people's worst nightmare! Do you understand what that means for you? It means that if your worst nightmare came true- you could live through it. That's the part that should let you take a big breath and let it out here. You see?! I am LIVING in spite of tragedy and challenges thrown at me. I am making the most of a terrible circumstance and am able to share with you some of those experiences so that you might look into your own life and appreciate more, let go a little more, enjoy a little more, forgive a little more, question your faith a little more, and think about Heaven a little more. But the most important thing for you to realize here at this moment is this...you can stop worrying and fretting about what could happen- because I am proof that even a big, bad thing won't bring your world to a halt.
Mine certainly got pulled out from under me and flipped upside-down. It's made me cry more tears than I ever imagined possible, it's made it hard for me to breathe sometimes, it's made me wonder why I care about vacuuming the floor or why people watch lame tv shows. It's made me want to scream and never smile again...and it's made me want to hold the people I love most and never ever let go. It's made me want to stay in bed and never get out again and it's made me go on the Oprah show and tell the world I am capable to forgive. It has made me more of who I am and will forever shape who I ultimately become. It is a part of me forever...and yet it can't control the way I feel. It has brought me to my knees and made me realize how weak I am, and given me eyes to see the strength that I've always possessed. It has drawn me closer to God than I ever deserve to be. It can do the same for you too.
There. I don't know if that will ease your mind...but it sure felt good typing it all out for you to read. And now you have something to bookmark for the next time life throws you a curveball. I don't wish it upon any of you- but hope it's comforting to know you will survive.
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5 comments:
okay, reading that made me want to stand on the couch, ala Tom Cruise, and yell "GO JODY!". After my accident, in moments of darkness, my Mom would remind me...God only gives us what we can handle, so you must be particularly strong. Based on that, Jody....you are a superhero.
Okay, have to write another one...as I'm reading this, Carrie Underwood's song "Jesus take the wheel" just came up on my itunes playlist. "Jesus take the wheel, take it from my hands, 'cause I can't do this on my own...I'm letting go." Uh, all I can say is....yep.
Wow Jody, another amazing entry that I was thinking about all day. I don't think I fully understood just how much I would love my children until my son was born 3 years ago. With the birth of my daughter 18 months ago I really felt like I would just explode with all the love I felt for them. What has amazed me even more is that as they grow and develop these neat personalities I am constantly thinking that I love them more than I did the previous day. Unfortunately, along with all that love is the constant worry about something terrible happening. You are doing moms such a service by helping us put things in perspective and help us to enjoy our children a little more on days when we are so overwhelmed. The problems that may seem "big" are in reality so "tiny" in the whole scheme of things. I often tell my husband that if asthma, eyeglasses & broken legs are the worst things we have to deal with for our children than we are indeed very lucky. Unfortunately, I do not think that most women "could live through it" as you did. You are obviously quite an extrodinary woman and your faith has gotten you to the point where you are today. It is wonderful how you are able to talk so deeply and honestly one day about your tragedy, share recipies the next & make us laugh with the skunk story another day. If things really do happen for a reason, then they also happen to the "right" (or wrong) person. The person who really can deal with it and somehow have some good come from it. Mothers are amazing people and I believe there is strength that comes with love. I have no doubt that if you had to lift that car off your daughter to save her you would have. You have done something just as difficult, you have lifted yourself & your family up to be the best mom for your children and have continued to live a beautiful life in spite of the challenges.
Thank you again Jody for sharing your life.
OK, I had no idea I wrote such a novel..sorry for going on & on!
Wow. Well said.
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