Saturday, November 26, 2005

Photography and life's paths....

So, if any of you out there are photography fanatics- I am just about to make a big purchase. Since some of you are into design and scrapbooking, I thought I'd give you a chance to comment on what you love or hate about the camera you shoot with. I am looking for a good, easy digital- high-end camera- mostly for taking photos of the kids and life in general...but would like to explore this world of photography more and more. So, drop me a note about your camera...and maybe it will help me decide on what to purchase.
On another note, my son just said at breakfast, "I just hatched an idea...". I don't know where he got that phrase- but I already smiled because of it. That's a good thing since the past couple of days I've been a bit "mope-y". I put up our "Barbie" Christmas tree (I'll post the story of that in a bit) and it makes me realize a lot of things about my life and the loss of Teagan. On most days her life seems to me more like a dream- I can remember all the happy things I love about her and how "easy" our life was before our accident...but then I do something like put up a big tree that helps me to celebrate her life and Christmas...but at the same time it's a big in-your-face reminder that she's not here and I'm missing out on the joy and excitement she would be sharing with us right now. So, that's the struggle. Those opposing feelings crash against one another inside me and sometimes I snap right out of it- while other times I just have to let them swarm inside and do their thing. That means I pout, and snip at the kids more than they deserve, I play and replay how my life could be different...and basically I just wish for a real life do-over. I know most of you won't have a clue what I'm talking about- but it's nice to have a place to write it all down and express myself for whoever wants to try to feel my life for a moment. ANd just so you know, I still am very grateful for all that I have and how much I am blessed. I haven't forgotten all that- I just take occasional sidetrips down that "feeling sorry" path...and then I come back to life. It's like the opening lines of Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens..."It was the best of times. It was the worst of times." Kind of sums up my life. Lucky for me the good in my life far outweighs the bad. I appreciate those of you who have chosen to walk this journey alongside of me and be there through it all. You help to keep my head up.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

me again! :) had to retrace my steps to find your blog as I had forgot to add you to my favorites. I also wanted to say thank you! For pointing me towards your story. I read it this morning and like so many people I was truly touched. I balled, I cried so hard I couldn't even read the screen. I felt so much just reading about what you and your family has gone through and wished I was close just to give you a huge hug. I hope you don't mind but I will be sharing that article with my Wednesday Church group. We are reading "the purpose driven life" by Rick warren and it has really helped me to make sense of my faith. To understand what God is asking me to do in my life. And I would not have been able to truly understand your story if it had not been for doing this course just recently. I believe things happen for a reason and I believe that I found you, your blog and your story at a time that I really needed to find it. God works in wonderful ways and I will be keeping up with you and your family Jody.

God bless you!

Iris said...

I came across your blog through Greta's. I love how authentic you are. When I read this post I wanted to comment, but words would never do justice, so I give you this cyber ((((hug)))), which also seems trite.

As for your question about a camera. I just purchased a Canon PowerShot S2 IS this summer and love it. I didn't want the bulk of a digital SLR, but I wanted more features than a simple point and shoot digital camera. I found exactly what I was looking for in my Canon S2. It has enough functions to be able to do some funky things, feels like you are holding something substantial when you are taking a picture, and is so easy to use. I am not one bit sorry that I invested in this baby. If you want to see samples of some of the things I've done with my camera, check out my blog and also link to my photoblog. I am absolutely no Tara Whitney (if you know who that is), but I am learning and having fun doing it. I hope this helped a bit.

Anonymous said...

My friend Kate has an amazing digital camera...you can check out awesome photos of her new niece "Ella" by going to the Papertales store website site and then clicking on "about us". The website is www.papertalesinc.com.

I know she'll be happy to share!

Anonymous said...

Hey Jody,
Just wanted to let you know that I have been keeping up to date with your blog. Thanks for letting me know that you have it out there. I know just how you feel about the holidays and the "in your face" reminders of ones that won't be with us this year. Being this was the first Thanksgiving without Mom, I had a real hard time even believing that it was Thanksgiving. I went up yesterday to get some Christmas decorations from Dad's and it felt so strange. I was thinking about how Mom loved to decorate and how she loved the Holidays. It was a time for family to come together again. Life will not be the same for me. But on the positive side, I was happy to take my "rememberances" of her to put in my home this year. I believe that it will help the kids too. Your family continues to be in my prayers daily, as is all of my family.
On a side note, as the photograher of the family, at least this side :), I have a Canon 20D. It is an 8 megapixel camera that is real user friendly. I use it to photograph family and friends as well as weddings. It is a little pricey so if you want to stay with something on the lower cost, the Canon family is a real good one to find something in. I will always use Canon.
Sorry to have missed you at Jeff's wedding, but just know that I was thinking about you guys. Enjoy the Holidays and just know that Teagan and her Great Aunt are playing together up there in heavan!
Blessings

Unknown said...

i know that you are already aware of this, but the side tracks you take are not failures in faith - but it's the reality of your life, this side of heaven. we can feel fully blessed and feel sorrowful for the tragedies that also occur..they can coincide simultaneously.

i hope that i wasn't 'hearing' you feel guilty/less-than-grateful through your entry. you are human and unfortunately, sometimes that just sucks. we are not yet living in a perfect world.

but god is still pleased with you, jody! remember that!! and cry and mourn when it's time to cry and mourn (he also told us that!)

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