Sunday, July 27, 2008

Just the way it is.

As if I could ever forget a smile so pure, a love so deep, a heart so big, a life lived so full of joy and laughter and non-stop energy...it's just not possible. Even 7 years later. Today my heart aches with the longing, the wishing, the wondering, the thought of just one more hug or kiss or pinky promise.
Still, I thank God I had her in my life for almost 4 and a half years. I thank Him for the memories, for the way she still 'feels close' at times, for the constant reminders that she was and always will be a part of our lives. I thank Him for helping us move beyond the pain to see beauty and to love fully again.
But to be honest, even after years of missing and moving forward, a part of of me will always miss her more than words can say. It's just the way it is. I so appreciate many of your thoughts, prayers and emails as we mark another annivesary and remember Teagan's life in a special way this week.
It's hard to believe it's been so long- I remember the events of that day as though it just happened. But I can also look at how far we've come and how many changes have taken place and it's true too- I see so many blessings and have so much to be thankful for. It's a strange combination of wishing things could be so different, yet feeling so grateful that things are exactly as they are.
Like I said...it's just the way it is. I can't put it any other way. I'm glad that even though she's gone, she will always be mine. I thank God He sent Teagan into my life. If even for only awhile.

39 comments:

Angie said...

God bless you and your family today- your story has touched me in so many ways. Most importantly, it makes me remember to hold my own children close and cherish every moment. I will be thinking of you all today.

clg0513 said...

thinking of you and your family today! Prayers, hugs and thoughts all around! You and your family have touched my heart in more ways than you will ever know.

Tabitha said...

Thinking of you today and sending you much love XXXX

Andrea said...

Love you so much Jody...I've been thinking about you so much.

Live a Life EXTRAordinary said...

Jody,
Thinking of you today.
with blessings, prayers and love.
Suz

Dawn B said...

Hugs and prayers to you and your family...

Heather said...

Thinking of you and sending you big hugs and lots of prayer!
Hope to see you soon!
Heather

Mandy said...

God bless you and keep you and your family as you miss little girl. You are such an inspiration to me and so many others. What an amazing woman you are. Thank you for sharing your life with me.

Mandy
GA
www.madelinegracefoundation.com

Keri said...

Thinking about you today!! Love and hugs from Houston.

Lori said...

Thinking of you all today!!!

Sending lots of love and prayers out to you all!!

xoxo

Anonymous said...

I am honouring Teagan's memory today Jody and Chip, and sending love to you all.

Jane

DeAnna said...

Thinking of you and your family today. Although we have never met, I read your blog almost daily.

Mere said...

I thought of y'all on the plane today.

Prayers, mere

Red Door said...

Jody, I am thinking of you all today and remembering Teagan...

Just Me said...

Sending hugs and prayers your way. How wonderful that Teagan is touching so many lives now, even though most of us only know her through the memories you have shared.

Take care,
Amanda

So Blessed said...

Praying for your family as you so lovingly remember Teagan...

kate stanton said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
kate stanton said...

Beautiful you - I've adored your blog for sometime now - you are a gift to so many. Thank you for sharing your pain, wisdom, love, and passion for life with me - a stranger in Norman, Oklahoma. Know that today I ask God to bless you and Chip and all the little ones in your home, Teagan, and the little prince inside you. May God continue to hold you in the palm of His hand. always, kate

guspiv said...

God Bless your family as you remember your sweet child and keep her legacy alive. I am so touched by your story.

The Hebert Family said...

I also lost my 19 month old daughter 3 years ago this week. I know the pain you feel and the heartache that doesn't go away. I'm sorry for the pain you have had to endure and will be praying and thinking of you often.

Anonymous said...

Jody, you and your family, and your story is such an inspiration to me. May you be aware of the presence of God in your life, today and always.
Ingrid - Jhb, SouthAfrica

Wendy said...

Jody, I've been reading your blog for a short time and marveling at what a woman of grace and faith you are, and how you have been able to keep the joy of the Lord under the most trying of circumstances. Your sweet Teagan is such a beautiful little one, she has such an infectious smile and her personality just leaps out of her pictures.
You will be in my thoughts and prayers as you are missing your precious girl -- may God continue to bless and comfort your family.

Hopesrising said...

Jody. I am praying for you and your family today. This post is very touching as we lost my Brother to a drunk driver forty nine years ago on July 27.
It brought me to thinking about my Mom and Dad. As well as some things said over the years.
So many times my Mom said the same words,*just the way it is.* Breaks my heart but we to learned to be so grateful for so many things.
Your story touches me deeply.
Please know your family is in our prayers.
Kerry

*Jilly* said...

Hugs & prayers for you and your family, Jody.

Anonymous said...

Your love, faith and devotion are a huge inspiration to me. God bless you and your growing family.
Much love and ^^prayers^^,
Laura Solomon

Honea Household said...

praying for you.

Daberath said...

Praying for a good week! Keep looking for God for comfort in your times of trials. Hugs and Prayers :)

Robin, Tommy, and Manze said...

Thinking of you and praying for you!

Kristin said...

I found your blog through Noah Steven's blog. I read the articles and was astounded by all you have endured. I don't know you at all, but I was quickly brought to tears. Your attitude is truly inspiring, and I wish you and your family continued peace.

lori said...

Praying for you and your family

Anonymous said...

Thank you for being the special person that you are!! God Bless you and your family! Even though I do not know you, I feel like I do.(I read your blog daily) Your stories have made me laugh and made me cry....Thank you for sharing your heart. I know Teagen is so proud of her mommy! Be Blessed from Indiana! Amy

Jo said...

you know I love you.....all of you xx

staceyfike said...

love you!!

Amanda said...

Praying for you in Cincinnati.

scrapnic72 said...

Each year that my birthday rolls around (July 29), my thoughts are drawn to Teagan and your family. While in a way it makes me very sad that my birthday was such a tragic day for you, on another level, I am also honored to share a day that was Teagan's birthday into the arms of Jesus. Praying for you today.

Blessings,
Nicole

heartsfullofluv said...

Teagan is and always will be so beautiful! You can tell even from the picture that her face lights up everyone around her. May God be close to you and wrap his arms around you and comfort you that he is loving her, taking care of her, and using her story for His glory. So many times I have read your blog with tears and hurt for your family. Thank you for being so honest and helping us appreciate even the smallest of moments as life is so precious--even as a vapor. Love to you and your family!

Devon Rene said...

thinking of you...

thank you for giving me inspiration and hope...

each day feels like a new heartbreak but i am only almost-5 months into missing my boys.

thinking of you...

Mae said...

I purposely stayed away from your blog so I could miss your postings honoring Teagan. I was so sure that my heart would break. It is so funny that when I felt it was a safe time to come back that I went back and read all of the posts about Teagan that I thought I didn't want to read. I think that I found myself needing your strength today. I am so sorry for your loss and grief and almost feel guilty that in some way, reading about your journey gives me strength. Seems crazy to me that God knows when to put people into my day. Isn't it great that He knows us and our needs so well?

I hope and pray that God continues to bless you and your family AND, I thank Him for sharing your story with me, today!

Jenn said...

You are a fabulous woman, with a fabulous family. I wish you peace and blessings.

Hugs,

Jenn