Equal airtime

Being a mom, as all of you moms already know, is life's biggest juggling act. It is my standing disclaimer here at Nitty.Gritty. that I am not an expert or sometimes even qualified in this arena of parenting, I simply have a lot of kids- which means I am experienced and have a few good tips. On the good days I can come here and brag to the world in picture and in word. On the bad days I am doing everything within my power not to chop my own head off and give up. Of course it's a disgusting thought- and I would never come close to doing something like that for real (I'm much too cool of a mom for THAT!), but life gets harried around here at times. Even striking a yoga pose and humming a monotone note with my eyes shut while breathing through my nose wouldn't bring things back to normal at times. Yet there's something about kids that makes you want to try. To try to be great- even in the day to day.
So today I am giving Bella her rightful blogspace- as Brock had his pancake post and Ava and Wyndham had their recent spotlights as well. I've got friends and family who check here for pictures and updates- so I'm being "fair and balanced" as a mom. [Incidentally, if you like fair and balanced journalism, you can check out www.foxnews.com for more of that subject.]
I couldn't help but pull out a photo of Teagan at the same time I give you Isabella- so that you can see the striking resemblance they share for yourself. It still stops me in my tracks on occasion, when I find Bella with a certain look or mannerism that was so "Teagan" at that same age. While Bella will never fill her big sister's shoes, I do look at her at times as my sort of "bonus kid", in that Chip and I were not even remotely thinking of more kids in our life when we found out we were pregnant with Bella. I did pray long and hard for another girl once I found out I was going to have another baby...but believe me, I never expected to get one with so many shared features to Teagan. Bella has been a big reason I'm the person I am today- post tragedy- with happiness and joy in life. She has been one of the reasons I've wanted to breathe again and experience the goodness life still affords to me.
Although keeping up with her energy and enthusiasm for even the little things in life can be exhausting (like her not going to bed until roughly 10:30 - 11:30 most nights),I can't help but love everything about her. I love the way she comes running to me in the morning with her arms open wide to give me a tight hug. I love the glint in her eye; the way she smiles mischieveously when she's planning her next adventure. I love that when she's being scolded she says through her tears, "I want to be a nice girl". She has a big heart. She has the energy to match and it makes my job enormous and full everyday. Bella, along with the rest of the gang in my house, is the reason I strive to be my best. I don't deserve all I've been given. But I recognize the gifts in my life. And I a realize my good fortune of being a part of theirs everyday.