Special connections.

I have had several emails in the past few weeks as well as a few comments asking me different things about Wyndham and her special needs. I have no problem talking about her condition and have doneso in posts here from time to time. Apparantly there are quite a few 'new people' reading and so I thought I would just give some details and a little update on how Wyndham is doing these days.
The photos you see here were taken just today. I thought they were special {as I think ALL the photos I take are special} but moreso because they capture Wyndham and her growing connection or understanding of who Crew is on our lives and hers. I was going to just snap some photos of Wyndham in her room, so I laid Crew done on her bed while she did a short photoshoot. Of course I had to snap some of Crew too, but I loved that I got a few of the two kids together.
I asked Wyndham if it was okay that Crew was sleeping on her bed and she flashed me a big grin. I knew that smile meant "yes". She is getting more and more comfortable with having a baby in the house, and even getting more and more interested in him when he squirms or squeaks or just sleeps. I didn't capture the kiss she gave him in that one picture, but it was very sweet and gentle and it's obvious that she is loving him more and more each day. Just like the rest of us.
We often 'forget' that Wyndham has 'special needs' and I write special in quotes because I really think all my kids have special needs- Wyndham's are just more pronounced and often take medical interventions and extra resources. Her issues came about as a result of a closed-head injury which she received at the time of our incident in which Teagan was killed and the rest of us injured at the restaurant back in July 2001. Wyndham was strapped in an infant carseat and was just shy of 7 months old, and weighed about 9 pounds. She was small but was meeting milestones and doing very well with her development. With her head injury, she spent several weeks on life support and ultimately ended up having brain surgery and a permanent shunt placed in her head.
Based on the severity and location of her internal brain bleeding, the neurosurgeons were not all that promising of her prognosis. Some just told us, "she'll likely never walk or talk", one said, "she's retarded" and then one told us she couldn't predict how or what Wyndham was capable of learning or understanding, but that the best thing we could do for her would be "to treat her as normally as you can and wait and see what happens". That's basically what we have done for the past 7 years with Wyndham. She has been in ongoing therapy since leaving the hospital in August of 2001.
We've been amazed at times at the progress and things she has learned and mastered, including walking at age 4 and 3/4 years old. Nobody tries harder to meet her goals and 'be like the other kids' than Wydham. She pushes herself more than I would, if I were her, and rarely "complains"- even if she doesn't like what she has to do.
Her speech is her biggest issue at this point. She has been learning American Sign Language for a couple of years now and knows more than 300 signs. However, she rarely uses them unless she is prompted to do so. Meaning, she can be dying of thirst and even though she knows the sign for drink or even specific types of drinks (ie. water, milk, juice), she will go thristy rather than show you she needs a drink. There is a big disconnect as a result of her head trauma which somehow blocks the messages from getting out. Wyndham can hear fine and she also makes sounds- she laughs and hums and mimics and even has said a few words, but we don't know if she will ever talk fully or not. We keep working on that and we are always hopeful!
For those of you who have asked about sign language, I recommend "Signing Times" as a resource for learning sign language as well as for great products to enhance learning. Wyndham has several dvd's and they have been so good for her, for me, and for the rest of the kids to learn basic words and phrases. There are also some great books available that make it easy to learn the basics. I encourage anyone to learn the alphabet and simple signs- it seems like more and more people are using sign these days for many reasons. One of the biggest concerns for Wyndham is that she is learning lots of signs, but that creates a growing gap in the way others can communicate back to her. The more people that know and use sign around her, the more it reinforces what she knows and opens doors for two-way communication.
I never thought I would be a mom of a handicapped child. Oftentimes when I put the little hanger up on my rear-view mirror I feel sort of 'funny'. I don't always feel like Wyndham fits the typical profile of handicapped, and yet technically she does. We have tried so hard as a family to 'be normal' and to just do all the things we would usually do, and yet there are things that are challenging to us and still cause us to be 'labeled'.
I hope that sheds a bit of light on our situtation for some of you new readers. We thank God for sparing Wyndham's life even though we have had to struggle with her and she has had some uphill battles and many setbacks through the years. We know that God has allowed her to overcome so much and we love that He has healed her in many ways. She is such an easy-going girl much of thetime, and she brings lots of joy and happiness and smiles to the people around her each day. She attends half-day kindergarten [3 days a week] in a regular classroom, she has therapy [PT, OT and speech] 3 afternoons a week, and then works with an independant assistant 2 afternoons a week. So she is busy learning all the time.
We always apprecaite prayers for her health and growth and learning. We love that she is doing so well right now and really, if you saw our family out and about, you would likely think we are just a 'normal family'. We have all worked hard to pull that off. =) Hopefully we will look back and see that some of these special challenges have not only been overcome, but have also allowed all of us to make special connections with others we might never have had the opportunity of meeting in life. Wyndham's needs have made us more aware and more sensative to others, and even though I don't wish special needs/handicaps on anyone, I have to admit in many ways they have been very good for all of our family. For that we have been changed forever and we feel blessed to have such special needs.

Stitching inspiration...and remember latch hook kits?

In all my free time {right?!} I was thinking I would take up embroidery again. I used to do lots of little crafty things as a kid/junior-higher. I made friendship bracelets and did some cross-stitch projects and even some latch hook kits.

Loved those things!

Anyway, it's been awhile since I posted any craft inspiration and so I give you this vintage Halloween embroidery pattern link that I just found.

Cute little ghosts.

They make me want to stitch one on a onesie. =)

Family-resemblences.

Several people have seen Crew in person and most people think he looks a lot like Isabella. I keep seeing a lot of Brock and Ava in him. The top photo here is Brock...what do you think? He does have Chip's coloring...but thankfully has my mellow personality. So far. =)
Thank you for all the prayers for our family as we grieve the death of Chip's grandpa. This loss comes just 2 months after Chip's uncle died so suddenly, so it makes this time even more sorrowful. We will miss their presence with the holidays just around the corner. Those are always the hardest times it seems. I also have to say I wish I had more photos of both these guys, and maybe now I can prove to Chip there is much truth in the statement, "there's no such thing as too many pictures".

Holding on to memories.

The top few pictures are my girls loving their yearbook. It's funny how they pull it off the shelf and want to look at it almost everyday. I have to admit I enjoy seeing them look at it so much, considering it's the yearbook I helped to design along with 8 students from our school. It was a learning experience and took a lot of heart and effort, but I am glad to see it paid off so well.

Then there's a picture of Crew getting a quick bath in little pedestal bathroom sink. Ava thought it was the funniest thing that a baby could take a tiny bath in a sink. She was right there to keep an eye on him and make sure he was happy. She was also anxious to help comb his 'tangles' out when he was dry too. She asked me, "how small are his tangles in his hair"? I think she's ready to have hers cut short just because Crew's hair is so soft and easy to style. =)

I also have Ava to thank for the photo of me kissing Crew. She's not only getting much better at posing and looking at the camera when it's pointed at her, but she's also wanting to hold the camera and take the pictures too. I guess it's never too soon to start fine-tuning her skills as a photographer, and what better way to practice than on a baby brother. He's a very good subject as he basically sleeps through all his photo sessions.

Lastly, I had to pull a photo from our family archives as we were so sad to get the news that Grandpa Willie- Chip's grandpa-passed away earlier today. We have heavy hearts and ached for Grandma Dot as the reality sank into our heads. We may be headed back to Minnesota in the very near future to be together with all the Bolducs/Ferlaaks and to reminisce and say our good-byes. We will miss Grandpa very much...and we will remember his smile and love for all of us and so many others for a very long time.

Ordinary is a lot busier than I expected!

There is still a lot of picture-taking going on around our home. The guys loved Notre Dame...and ND won too. They had a great time together.
There are spelling tests to practice for, 1st grade reading homework to listen to a few times a week, therapy to drop Wyndham off at, diapers to change, laundry to wash and fold {and sometimes put away!}, lunches to pack, kids to bathe, tangles to brush out of hair, diapers to change, baby to feed and hold...and feed and hold, and once in awhile I get a minute to blog. Just thought you might like to know how things are around here.
Busy, but pretty wonderful.
=)

It must be fall...

We received some wonderful goodies from the floral shop this week from Chip's parents...big baskets of candy, chips, mixed nuts, apples, oranges, sausage and cheese...thank YOU! As Grandma Karen can see from these pictures, the kids were more than excited to have "Halloween come early". Although Crew just slept through all the excitement. I guess he doesn't have a sweet tooth yet. =)

That little owl on top of the snacks came from a friend along with some other cute things for Crew. We have been so blessed by the outpouring of support and love and care from so many friends and family. Thank you to each and everyone of you! The baby announcements are being made and heopfully will be in the mail sometime this next week.

A little note about the card design... the black & white image of Crew was edited and emailed to me by my fashionista friend, Corinne. I love that photo of him...thanks, Corinne! Next, I found the circus image here at flickr.com. It was just the type of picture I was looking for and I was so happy to get approval to use the image from the designer, Jon Turner. I emailed him earlier this week and told him how much I liked his illustration and he was more than willing to let me use it for Crew's cards. So thank you, Mr. Turner! Yet another reason for me to love the internet. =)

One of the things I remember so clearly about my first pregnancy with Teagan was the night my parents came over and Chip and I had a spread of cards sitting on our coffee table. We were working together on making Teagan's birth announcements and my mom commented on how it was so wonderful to do such a thing but that "you'll never do this for any of your other kids". She also mentioned how my older brother had the most baby pictures taken and memories captured in his baby book and for each sibling thereafter, the photos and baby books were more and more sparse. I remember telling my mom that wasn't going to happen... but I secretly believed she was right.

Well, as it turns out, I not only take more photos than ever (especially since we've gone digital as well as the tragedy of Teagan making me even more of a 'photo-freak'), but our mailing list of friends and family has grown over the years too, so I make even more cards for each baby we've added to our family! I did opt to go simple in my card design this time around. So at least I'm learning a few things along the way.

Lastly...can anyone guess where Chip and Brock are headed right now as I post this blog? Look closely in their photo. Notice the Notre Dame hats. Yep. They're going toSouth Bend, Indiana to watch some football... [Notre Dame vs. Stanford] and take in some of the sights around the campus- including Touchdown Jesus. I don't know who was more excited as the left home this morning- Chip or Brock. I do know that they were happy to be spending the day together. What a great way to kick off the fall! Happy October to everyone reading this today...enjoy the colors, flavors and fun that this season brings.

That would be too easy...

I've figured it out. My life would be easier if I took fewer pictures; I would have more time in my schedule to do other things. But that's not happening anytime soon. =) The kids love self-portraits almost as much as I do- as you can see in the above photos.
I have also found hats and headbands to be my friend on days that I don't get around to doing my makeup and scrunching hair product in my hair. If I remember correctly, I've done similar personal maintenance routines with all my other babies too. Only I used to wear my hair in ponytails...it was so easy.
My final 'easy thought' is one that came about after I watched portions of the Vice Presidential debate last night. Crew has a baby gown with the word 'cozy' printed on the front of it. Whenever Ava sees it on him, she says, "awwwe, he's cozy!". Now, I'm thinking our elected officials might adopt a similar strategy and start wearing clothing with statements on them just to take some of the guesswork out of the voting we all have to do in just a month or so. I would love to just be able to glance at a candidate and see them sporting a shirt that reads, "telling the truth" or "Honest" or even "I might raise taxes, but I mean well in the end". It would be so much easier. Right?! =)

Getting things done.

I find it ironic that a newborn can sleep for hours in a day {and Crew is a good sleeper!} and yet I still feel like I can't get things done around my house. How does that happen?!

Maybe it's because my 'to-do list' is too long.

Maybe it's because I have 4 other kiddos that get things out, need help with homework/reading, never-ending laundry to fold and a stack of birth announcements and thank you notes to write.

I had to post more photos and love that even though the older kids don't like to stop and pose for me anymore, that I can actually capture them doing everyday stuff together once in awhile. This time they were all watching the wedding scene from the video "The Princess Bride". The girls loved seeing Princess Buttercup all dressed up in her gown and crown, while Brock was laughing at the way the officiant said 'mawwigge is what bwings us togethoe today". They all thought that Andre the Giant was funny instead of scary and thankfully it was too close to dinnertime that the girls didn't get to see any sword-fighting. =)

I guess part of the reason why I don't get everything done each day is the simple fact that I want to be "in the moment" with my kids and family and love and laugh with them and play and have fun too. That's a good reason to let things go, if you ask me.

I encourage you to let things go and just enjoy and live in the moment too. It's good for everyone! At least until you run out of clean clothes to wear.

Measuring him against a dollar.

Besides making Jell-o and rice pudding and cupcakes on Sunday, I also tried my hand at a photo shoot with Crew. I'm not the world's greatest photographer, that's for certain, but I have to admit that Crew was very cooperative as a subject and made things a bit easier for me than any of his siblings have done in quite some time.
These photos can be enlarged if you click on them- and I type that mainly for my family and friends who haven't got to see him or hold Crew in 'real life' yet. I wanted to give them a sense of how small he is (he's 7 lbs. 8 oz. today) and that's why he's got a dollar bill at his side in the last picture.
So, although the economy is being shaken up a bit right now, I'm happy to say that Crew seems very comfortable next to the dollar and I really doubt that he's to blame for any economic slump we may be in. Now or ever. =)

What we did this weekend...

Wyndham and I worked in the kitchen making food like rice pudding, Jell-o (remember when I was excited that I made Jell-o when I had my first baby? Teagan was 3 weeks old and I was thrilled and called Chip at work to tell him I had made Jell-o...now I do 10 times more work by noon and I have 4 more kids...how does that happen?!) and blue "Welcome to the world, Crew" cupcakes (Wyndham is signing cupcake in the top photo and doing a silly dance/song thing in the other three pictures.) for a cookout we hosted for our neighbors. The men all helped Chip put a shed up in our backyard, and were "watching" the kids at the same time. As you can see, the kids were more than happy at the lack of supervision. But don't worry, at least the dads were wise enough to take the key out of the atv ignition whenever it wasn't in use.

I am finding life with a newborn to be sort of "extreme". While Crew is very mellow, I have bursts of energy countered with long stretches of fatigue. Hence, the blogging is sporadic and when I am tired I find I feel guilty about it. At this point, I am feeling good- which means yesterday was a bit more rough.

You'd think I'd have this 'balance thing' all figured out, but it's not so. It's called 'listen to your body' and at 35 I'm still not keen on that. I like the idea of push yourself and then hit-the-wall for some odd reason. I guess I'm a little bit crazy and yet feeling pretty good at times, so that's when I forget to 'listen' and rest.

Tonight I plan to get to bed early- just like last night and see if I can stay on top of things a bit better. If not, there's always Starbuck's Pumpkin Spice Lattes. =)