Happy Birthday, Chip!

You know there has to be a birthday tribute to the Nitty.Gritty. husband today, because it's not just April Fool's Day, but also Chip's birthday.

He was born prematurely, and as small as he was at birth...and fragile too, I can honestly say that there are many people in the world who are grateful for his will to live, his competitive nature, & his zest for life. Especially me. I believe that it's so true...good things come in small packages.

I have been lucky to have Chip at my side for about 13 years now...and while I have heard some debates recently about the subject that women shouldn't feel 'pressure' to have a man in their life, I know I wouldn't be who I am without Chip in my life. I was a 'whole person' before I met Chip, and actually when we first met, the last thing I was intending was to date him. I was very comfortable with my life and was enjoying being single. I didn't feel like I needed a "Jerry McGuire moment" or someone to 'complete me'.

For whatever reason (and a lot of laughter and fun and just simply the fact that Chip brought out the best parts of me) we ended up together, and I wouldn't trade our friendship and struggles and experiences and growth together for anything in this world. It's truly amazing and special. And I'm not just saying that because it's Chip's birthday....or that it's April Fool's Day. =)

It's the truth- every single day. I thank God for allowing my path to cross with Chip's- even though I didn't think I needed a guy in my life.

I have to admit, I take him for granted sometimes, and the kids miss him during the really busy golf season, and of course we would all like to spend more down time together- with family and friends...but to be able to hug him and laugh with him and enjoy life from day to day, well, that is my privilege and joy in life.

Happy 39th birthday, Chip...to the most amazing guy I have known in my life. Hugs and kisses from all your Nitty.Gritty. kids too. They think you're the greatest...and they happen to be right!

Sugar overload...

From Lik-m-dip's to mini cheesecake brownies to pie and ice cream. Whether real or pretend, we have had our share of sweets around the house this week. Chip's birthday is on Sunday. I would declare our house 'sugar-free' this weekend, but I have feeling we will have to have a little something in celebration.

Monday morning starts our kids' spring break. I am planning on laying off the sugar and pushing the veggies instead. Wish me luck! =)

Somehow, Chip has managed to stick to a fairly healthy diet through all our desserts. Maybe there won't be birthday cake and buttercream afterall. Poor guy...with an April Fool's birthday, he never knows quite what to expect from all of us!

Four years and three days.

That's how long Brock has been waiting for this moment. It has not been easy. He's had to try and try and get frustrated and there have been moments of anger and doubt. But yesterday, he learned an important lesson in perseverance. Some things in life are worth fighting for.

Riding a bike is just one of those things. Today he got out there and fell down and got tired and frustrated all over again. But after a few more trys, his confidence and ability began to kick in. It was so great to witness...one of those moments in life where you couldn't put a pricetag on it...it really was priceless. Just now he came inside the house with one of the biggest grins I've seen in a long time. Sure, it's great to place first in a speech meet. Certainly there is something to be said for those terrific math scores and the list of books he read through for the recent Read-a-Thon at school.

But this time was different. It was years of trying and expending effort and finally realizing what we've been encouraging him to do all along really was to his benefit. We weren't lying. Riding a bike really is easy and worth all the effort it took to be able to ride all by himself. As a parent, I was proud. And I know he is now one step closer to the day we will eventually have to let him go out into the world- all by himself.

What's on my mind...

I guess the best way to describe my 'scrap-style' is this- 'Don't try to figure it out'. =) Some scrappers are very 'predictable' when they scrap. They have a certain 'look' or elements that you can expect in virtually every layout. Like Cathy Zielske...she's 'clean and simple'. I stuck fairly closely to her philosophy in that top layout of Chip and me (which I have to 'fix' because I typed the wrong year on it), but butchered it in the Hello Kitty layout. I have no common margins, no 'visual three's', and just basically did a free-style thing on it. Or think Heidi Swapp...just because I love her style and products. =) You can expect paint or chipboard on almost every single page she creates...lots of handwriting and solid colored backgrounds. She makes it 'work' everytime!
Then there's Elsie...always trying something new and different,and yet is just 'looks Elsie'. Am I right?! Me? I'm still trying to figure out what exactly it is that drives me to make pages. Or not make pages as some weeks go. =) I have a head full of ideas at any given time, but I'm finding I hold back, just because I'm not really sure what my 'style' is, and so I feel like I have to have the design figured out before I actually pull all my products together and stick them down on the page.
In these two layouts, I decided to just go for it. There was no 'pre-planning' or much thought to the overall design. In fact, these two layouts turned out totally different in their finished form, than the idea I sort of formed in my head as I sat down to create them. And you know what? I still like them. Both of them, because they show to me that I don't have to just do one thing when it comes to scrapping. Maybe that's my style...to shake it up each time, I don't know. I guess I am still in the process of figuring myself out from day to day, and it's only appropriate that that carries over into my scrapping life as well. Besides, I haven't even been doing this for a year yet, so I keep reminding myself that I am 'young' and still have a lot of learning to do when it comes to this part of me.
That's a part of the fun...the process, and growing and experimenting. Just how I like my life to be! I have always had a few 'quirks' in life. Just ask my family about what I was like growing up (if you're reading, Steph and Jacque, my Ragstock-trench-coat-phase comes to mind!) or ask Chip what he has to say about me. They'll tell you I can be a real oddball. That feeling that I've always had inside came out in the Hello Kitty layout full force. The part of me that never liked herself in Jr.High and High School is finally coming to terms with reality. And that, I am realizing, no matter how it looks on a scrap page, is a very good thing.
This is the message I wanted to share on my 'quirky' page. It says:
"At age 34 I am {finally} BeGiNing to love & accept myself just the way I am...including my Love of all things Hello Kitty."
It's about time, huh?!

Radical truths.

Sometimes (most times) in our busy, noisy lives, we struggle to find truth and make sense out of life and our purpose for living. I think there is a longing in every heart to know the truth. I have really enjoyed our sermon series at church the past several weeks- all about 'stories that Jesus told'. I have found them to be very 'timely' and full of good applications for living a life that really matters. Our pastor (Pastor Bill Rudd) has a new blog, which offers a bit more insight into the messages.
I have also listened to some really great messages from a couple of other insightful teachers of the truth. One is my former professor of theology, Greg Boyd, who has made me stop and think on more than one occasion. He is a bit more dynamic then some traditional preachers that you may have grown up listening to- he breaks the stereotype most people have of what a preacher looks and acts like. He used to play the drums like no other during the music portion of worship in church, and then swig some Mountain Dew before and during his preaching. I'd encourage you to listen to one or two of his messages, just to see what 'radical truth' sounds like sometimes! Especially check out his message from March 4, 2007- "The Kingdom is a really messy Party". Here is a list of some of the books he's written- which I'm sure you can find through Amazon.com or other websites.
Another spot I can wholeheartedly point you to are the messages linked here. This pastor here (Steve Goold) will tell it like it is- sometimes that's just the way we need to hear it. I have found some really great quotes and encouragement, and yet totally without 'fluff' or a 'nice package' like some people wish they could get their 'fix'. We often think that life is supposed to be 'easy' or comfortable and go our way. We fight the bad stuff that can come at us in all sorts of ways, and somehow buy into the idea that life is about getting to the top- being successful and having it all.
The messages and links I share with you here will challenge that thinking. It will sound so absolutely contrary to what 99% of the world is telling you is true. Yet, in the end, the truths you find in them will be 100% true, and absoultely something that you can believe in and challenge yourself to become more of. So, if you're looking for a little something to shake up your simple way of life, or to stop you in your tracks and ask, "Is there something more to life...am I missing something?", well then, follow the links, and prepare to be changed.
I believe you will find truth, wholeness, contentment and ways to strengthen your faith. There are lots of great messages and links...I hope that these offer you a good start!

Everyday pictures.

These photos are all mixed-matched pictures from last week. Basically if you are around me long enough or read back into the archives here at Nitty.Gritty., you notice a major theme. That would be 'loving your ordinary life'. I cannot stress this enough. It was something I was learning and applying to my life to a certain degree before our lives were touched by tragedy, but now have an even greater awareness that I need to love every minute I have been given, and to enjoy them and make the most of them- no matter what!

Granted, I blow it from time to time, and then feel really bad and have to apologize to people in my life, and then I refocus and get back on track. It keeps me humble, and is a good reminder to me, that life is a learning process and for me I strive everyday to be a better person than the day before.

Today then, these pictures remind me how much I love my life and my family and all the things that have made us who we are. They are a reminder to enjoy the present, to savor the simple, and to take each day as it comes~ just the way it is. I never want to lose sight of the things that truly matter to me...and then remember that they are gifts in my life- every single day.

Target is calling my name.

There are 58 different designer rainboots for women at Target. It's like a sick marketing ploy for a person with my genetic make-up...one who buys things because of the color combo or the interesting design, or simply because it's a little bit funky. At $19.99 a pair, these are a great price. But with more than 10 designs catching my eye it's a shame. I can't justify spending $200 on boots, and besides, I do not have space or need for that many- no matter how cute they are. So, instead, I'm passing on the link to you here.

Have fun browsing and seeing if there are any boots that catch your eye. I'm sure I'll cave and pick up a pair. The others will have to just be saved and used as my desktop background, and/or printed out and scrapped on a page. =) That's just what any good scrapper would do, right?!

The Way I See It #233. Exactly!

I was fortunate to be given the opportunity to trek up to northern Michigan (yes, the Sugar Bowl is still there...still going strong!) in {Chip's} new Highlander-Hybrid and enjoy an quick visit with old friends, new friends, and I scored a latte too. =)
It was one of those times in life where I saw many ways that God had things fall into place for me in order for this trip to take place. The time I put into my preparations more than blessed me with new insights, new challenges, and just a clearer sense of who God is and should be in life. I don't claim to be an expert on the topics of which I spoke {that picture is the intro slide of the presentation I gave..."Nitty.Gritty. Thoughts on passion and Spiritual Growth"}, but I found it to be a really great and an appropriate topic for busy Moms especially, but also to anyone who is feeling the need to slow down the pace of life, and get their priorities aligned with the goals and dreams they have- which are hopefully aligned with God's purpose and plans for our lives too. That is the key to living a life of peace, contentment and joy. It's about making intentional choices, seeking our highest purpose and calling in life, and letting go of anything that gets in the way of that.
You see, I am learning that the less I call the shots in my life and instead sacrifice what I think I need and want from day to day, that God in turn blesses that willingness in my heart, and gives me things which fill me more than the things I thought I really wanted in the first place. Okay...I need to go back, maybe you do too, and reread that, because it is so true. I believe, more and more, that that truth is becoming so contrary to what our American culture is telling us about ourselves and how we should live our lives. It's really about tuning out what society or the media or our environment is saying we should be doing, and instead, listening to what is our true heart's desire...which if it is in sync with God's desires and ultimate purpose and design for your life, I truly believe you will experinece a life of peace, contentment, joy. In the end, you will be living a life of true freedom. No matter what your circumstances, pressures or any other outside factor that comes at you and threatens to steal that from you; you will know true peace and that's the truth.

Most imporantly though, I talked about how it isn't always easy. In fact, I am beginning to see that many times our troubles in life are really opportunities for us to do some soul-searching, but instead, we get hung up on them or in them. We struggle to make sense of them and oftentimes, we don't know how to do that. I talked about how it's really a process. Sometimes an on-going one at that. I really think that if we embrace our struggles, and instead of feeling we are victims of circumstances or getting angry at these problems, or worse, feeling depressed and sorry for ourselves in the midst of these problems, we can ask ourselves, "what can I learn from this crisis; how can I grow through this trial, and what ways can I use this situation to become a better person in life because of it?". I know... it really isn't easy. I am also fully aware of the scope and range of growing issues in life that can creep up or show up unannounced- no matter who we are, what we do, or where we live. Really. I'm talking about 'big stuff'...like cancer, and death and divorce. Maybe your 'big thing' is a sudden job loss or some other financial disaster that looms just in front of you. For others, it could be a series of health concerns or infertility, that no matter how many tests or treatments or experts you talk to, you find yourself with no clear answers or direction to take next. Some of the hardest things in life to overcome are the ones that have changed and shaped your life in many ways, as you were a kid- growing up. Maybe it was a form of abuse, or a home in which you lived and yet never felt loved or secure, and because of that reality, you have found yourself going through life trying to fill those 'empty, hurting parts of yourself' with all sorts of things that seem to offer answers or temporary healing...like a job or sex or alcohol or food...anything that can numb you to the reality of the pain of your life. These kinds of things are like covering a massive wound with a bandaid. They just don't cut it in the longrun.

I know that this happens because I have lived it, but also witnessed it, first-hand and second-hand and even beyond that, through the lives of people around me. It is true at some point in every single life. Nobody is immune to the problems of this world.

Fortunately though, I fully believe that there is Hope for the hurting, that there is Strength for the weary, and that there is an Answer to every problem. It's up to you to seek the Truth, and begin to apply it and then experience it fully in your own life.

I am grateful for the opportunity to speak to some of that and to hopefully serve as an encouragement to not give up if you are in the middle of life's trouble, or just feeling that life has lost some of it's luster, and you just don't see much beauty or joy in it anymore. Once you 'get' what Life is truly about, you will find it to be full and exciting and really a joy from day to day, no matter where you are or what you do.

Maria Fadiman put it this way, in #233 The Way I See It, on the back of my Starbuck's cup yesterday morning. It states that she is a geographer and National Geographic Emerging Explorer, and her quote goes like this:

"I used to think that going to the jungle made my life an adventure. However, after years of unusual work in exoctic places, I realize that it is not how far off I go or how deep into the forest I walk that gives my life meaning. I see that living fully is what makes my life- anyone's life, no matter where they do or do not go- an adventure".

I think that is how we should embrace all of life and our problems. Tune out the world, listen to your heart, hear what Life is trying to tell you, and then respond appropriately, and with intention. I am thankful for each new day in my life and the opportunities- the good and the bad- that serve to grow me and challenge me to become all that I can be.

To the ladies that I got to meet (and see again, Heidi S. and others!), thank you. I throughougly enjoyed my time with you. I hope that you got a little something out of all that talking and laughing and crying we did together. I look forward to my next adventure in life, and I hope you do to!

Interesting.

Funny. You live somewhere and have so many big events happen in that place, and yet you forget so many things. I had three babies in this town, had a funeral for another, bought my first home, made lifelong friends...basically did a lot of living here. Yet, a flood of memories hits me each time I drive into Gaylord.
It's amazing to me how much I 'forget' when I'm not here. It's nice to come "home" every once in awhile. Feels good. Makes my 'memories real again'...and that's a beautiful thing.
The fact that there isn't much snow on the ground for this time of year, and now there's a Starbucks in town, makes it that much more sweet to be here.
No matter where I live in this world, a part of my heart will always be in Gaylord. I felt it today.

One Hit Wonder.

Found this on Elsie's blog. Now there's a girl with spunk, zest for life, and obviously too much time on her hands to find links like this! Really, I *love* her...always fun colors and ideas and inspiration on her blog.

When I saw this today, I just HAD to go there. My stomach was growling...time to feed my 'fame addiction'. =) If you feel the need to do the same thing for your own blog, go here.

Honestly? It has nothing to do with my fame addiction (which I don't think has ever been properly diagnosed), and everything to do with the fact that it's been too long since I've typed or talked about 'buttercream' around here. Buttercream makes me happy. I just was taking my own advice from my last entry and creating a little happiness. For me and some of you.

Happiness is...

If you are a scrapper, you can't help but scroll through these pictures and sense a scrap page coming on. This is a series of photos that I took of Wyndham while she ate icecream yesterday. I was sitting in the middle of the dining room table while she did her thing. Total happiness. In the form of a cup of fudge-swirled icecream- complete with the little 'wooden spoon'. For a few moments, this was our life...Wyndham and her icecream, and me and my camera making sure I didn't miss a drop. =)
To be fair (or 'unfair' to Wyndham as it was), she is having this moment of icecream bliss all to herself, because while she was at therapy, I took Brock, Bella and Ava to our local Marble Slab ice cream shop and we had our own icecream bliss; we shared a big dipper of coffee icecream with chocolate chips and marshmallows mixed in it. We were still 'celebrating Teagan' through our icecream treats yesterday, a day after her birthday...but close enough so we didn't feel guilty about the calories or the fact that dinner was only an hour away. =)
My plans to scrap a layout with these pictures are going to sit on hold for a few days, because I am in the midst of another project. A full-blown Nitty.Gritty. PowerPoint Presentation. I have the privilege and opportunity to head back to our former hometown of Gaylord, where I have been invited to speak to the MOPS (Mother's Of PreschoolerS) group this coming Thursday. I am excited to see some of my friends and connect for a short time with them and share with them in person, some of the thoughts I have been kicking around in preparation for this time together. It's gonna be fun. There might be some little surprises, and if I may be so bold to say so, I have a feeling that God is going to 'show up' for the morning too. I just have been so moved in preparing for this time, that it just seems fitting that God will be there to challenge us even more than I can do on my own.
So, if you're in the area, or you know someone who is, I'd love to have you show up too! In the meantime, and in case I get bogged down with trying to get everything done before I go and I neglect this blog for a couple of days, I will challenge you to stop for a minute at some point in your day, and "look for happiness" somewhere. Maybe in your kids, like I saw through Wyndham and some icecream yesterday. Maybe it's in doing something unexpected that creates happiness in the life of a coworker, friend, or family member. Maybe it's in taking a moment for yourself and simply making a short list (1-5 things off the top of your head) that you truly ARE thankful for in your life...but that sometimes you overlook because it's always there. {Like your refridgerator full of food, or your email contacts that at any time you can send a note to someone on that list just to say hello, or your spouse...who doesn't always turn his/her socks right-side out, but who does so much more for you in life that makes the 'sock-thing' actually a privilege for you! That kind of stuff.}
Whatever it may be, I encourage you to find it. Or create it. There is plenty of 'bad stuff' in this world in which we live each day, that I think it's only fitting for us to intentionally look for or create Joy and happiness in life at times. It makes life not only bearable...but {gasp} FUN once in awhile! That's what I love about my life. That's what I am seeking more of...and although I don't deserve goodness and joy and happiness because of anything I have done in my life, I am learning to accept it as a gift when it comes my way.